Confession X - The Finale
When i was in 4th grade all the 5th and 6th graders picked on us. After watching South Central, i formed my own gang of 3rd and 4th graders. We used to get mobbed by groups of 4/5… but when we started rolling around 30 deep they couldn't do shit. We beat up a lot of kids until the administration found out and we either got suspended/expelled.
This was when i first started realizing i had influence over people.
At my olders brothers graduation, i was in charge of videotaping. pops was like make sure not to record over anything important. i found a stack of unmarked tapes in a closet and popped one in. While my fam was watching/ halfway through it cuts into 70's porn. hardcore lol moment but i was 5 at the time and scared shitless
one of the most attractive things to me is the way a girl smells. i hate that shit when they purposely leave articles of clothing at your place or in your car. the whole room just resonates that smell and you can't help but think about them.
im pretty good at moving on after a brief fling, but damn this one girl left over a scarf and i smelled it everyday for a week until the smell went away. when it did go away i returned it
if you dont know by now, im real particular about things. i usually hate all gifts given to me. tryin to be stylin' ya feel me.
even going to the gym, i always make sure i'm looking sharp. i won't wear wrinkled shirts or anything baggy. i don't have 'old shirts' to throw on. usually after something gets old or not as fashionable i donate them to a third world country.
my entire wardrobe usually changes completely within two years.. but i think i'm at peace now of who i am and what my style is. i can't imagine it changing dramatically from this point forward. kind of a grown up casual, a little GQ, slightly rough but always sharp.
i'll say it, i'm materialistic. having money to buy things makes me happy. and appearances are extremely important to me. i don't think that makes me shallow.
someone earlier in this thread said they couldnt care less about a persons looks, being fat, ugly etc.. i guess i understand it, but don't believe it. yeah its possible for you to feel that way. to me that just seems idealistic or someone screaming to convince themselves they are this genuine pure person.
like come on it matters, but it doesnt have to be the end all be all like yall making it out to be.
i hate motivational quotes or love quotes. all too easy for me. read it and get inspired cool.. but to requote it, its kind of saying like youre trying to tell everybody you live by this motto.
my motto is dont talk about it, be about it. this is the only place where ive talked this much about myself. in person, people see how i am and i'll let them judge me on that.
also for people who say they don't care what people think. i think that's great and sometimes idealistic too. around where i grew up it's all about respect and how people see you in what light. don't take it too far, its not like you got to be fake, just saying if you got respect you got respect.
my life revolves around women too much. everything in my condo was bought with the thought 'what would girls like'. i guess its kind of true for me, the saying of 'everything a guy does is with the thought of women in mind'
i'll be 27 in 2 weeks. all of the good women my age are getting married, but i refuse to date anyone under the age of 24. i'm sorry i just feel like you don't have anything to talk about if you aren't. of course there are exceptions but i ain't taking my chances
i stole like 10 bikes one summer when i was 13. my backyard was the scrap shop. interchanged parts and spray painted the frames over. fuck it, throw some stickers on it too- make it your own
for all the illegal shit ive done when i was younger (fraud, theft, straight up selling shit out of stores that ive worked at, shit even sold dope) ive never been in trouble with the authorities
im honestly blessed and thankful that i finished school and got a decent career and am done with all that past shit in my life. it didnt take me getting locked up to understand what i was doing wrong. its not anything i regret, for some its just something you go through and hope you grow out of.
my moms has a friend that everytime i see her she always says how handsome i am. thats what older people say about the younger generation. but she always staring at me to the point im uncomfortable, i think she wants to hook up, but damn she like 45. a bad 45.
i had brief employment working at bloomingdales, selling women fragrances. this is where i learned to talk to females. talking to damn near 60 woman a day about anything and everything but the damn fragrance. i hooked up with a couple of girls my age, but there were older women interested too but i didnt really know how to handle that situation and shied away. cougars before the cougar phenomenon.
to this day i hate rollercoasters. cause god damn when you're young the fun thing to do when your a kid, teen, young adult whatever was go to shit like six flags or knots and jump on these rides. everytime im on one, right before the drop i close my eyes and just hold my breath. that shit scares the fuck out of me. got places like disneyland where fools getting their heads decapitated. thank god for everyones love of alcohol and clubs, because that became the new thing to do.
ive seen people shot, stabbed and i got enough nerve to not look away. i can stomach that. but shit like hearing people grind their teeth in their sleep give me the queeziest feeling. i can't stand that
also afraid of heights, im not talking last rung ladder type of heights, or standing on top of a roof. that aint nothing. im talkin like pool party at the standard or w, or at the playboy/moon club in vegas where youre like 100 stories up. i can picture myself tumbling to my death everytime.
i like how for every 1 girl on this board, theres like 5-6 guys being extra cute to her. thats cute teeheehee
i don't ever use emoticons or them smiley faces ever. i put it on the same level as dudes sipping their drinks from a straw. it took me forever to just use 'lol'. i always thought it was this internet age of butchering the english language.
i got over 160 pair of shoes. yes they make me happy.
i once got addicted to that mexican red chili powder shit you put on fruit. man i ate mangos and oranges everyday like 10x a day with that. i got nauseous and threw up and it was the worst feeling ever. i much prefer the feeling of jameson whiskey coming up.
that was like 5 years ago, all of my vomits have been alcohol/drug related since then.
if i could live life over again i'd be an astronaut or an fbi agent
the only thing i watch on TV is sports. i dont watch tv shows until theyre out on DVD then ill go into straight marathon mode until i get pale. i watched 24 seasons 1-5 in like two weeks. i was dieing at work. i think i had a dvd player in my car at the time and watched on my lunchbreaks
now was a good time to post this confession, seeing a bunch of silly things posted.cause everytime i post it seems like right after someone goes into their violent past or sexual abuse. it's almost like i bring it out. i know i dont, but damn if i didnt yall be talkin about night lights for the next two pages.
i sprayed fart spray on this dudes chest in 3rd grade, and he walked around smelling like shit all day.
in 4th grade i was that kid who found out about sniffing markers to get you high. whats worse is i got like 4-5 other dudes to consistently do it with me. see i told you i had influence.
most i ever lost gambling was 5000 and it was terrible because it wasnt just one bet, it was a string of bets that built up. and the bookie had come to collect my tab. i had to scratch and claw to come up with 5gs. ever since then i said i wouldnt gamble anymore, and i been pretty good about it. sure he would've broke my legs
you know when youre throwing a good party and cops come to break it up cause the neighbors called to complain. i am that neighbor. aint no reason to throw a fucking house party on a tuesday night cause finals is over. people got work the next day. wait til the weekend. or at least thursday college nights.
they'll never suspect it to be me though cause im that cool neighbor who just chills and smokes cigarettes up top listening to music.
i think the neighbor across is scared of me because he has young daughters 19/20/22 somewhere around there who wave hi to me. he should just chill im not interested in children.
i been typing at this for like 45 minutes now, not consecutively cause everytime someone has been coming to my desk i been minimizing this page. thank you arlong park i am 45 minutes closer to going home to work now.
this is my final confession and post on AP. im eliminating all of these time wasting things i do in my life to work smarter not harder. i mean fuck, waiting for spoilers at 2am on a tuesday night. i got to be real about this
god bless, good night.