@Jabra:
Becoming a Kunoichi is something she pursues in order to leave the country, as that was what Ace "demanded" of her in a weird tongue-in-cheek manner.
Whether that goal still counts for something if she finds someone else to take her is questionable.
That's a lot like saying seven-year-old Luffy's dedication to become a pirate would have gone out the window if Garp had just let him tag along on a Marine battleship for a voyage or two - that getting on the boat and having the adventure is more important than the path they take to get there.
The young Luffy aspired to be a pirate because he thought it would convince Shanks to take him along, much in the same way O-tama aspired to become a kunoichi because she believed it would convince Ace to take her out to sea. And yet, when the events of Chapter 1 drove home the fact that Shanks was not going to take Luffy with him and how unprepared Luffy was for the reality of life at sea, he did not give up on becoming a pirate and/or start looking for another ship… Instead, Luffy doubled down - he vowed to make himself ready, because he WILL become a pirate and he WILL go out to sea and have his adventure.
O-tama now knows Ace is dead - he's never going to come back and take her away on an adventure with him. And yet, even after learning that, Tama has repeatedly referred to herself as a kunoichi (mostly through her team-up with Momonosuke). It seems fairly plain to me that, even if it started as a means to an end, it isn't a dream that Tama has given up on or de-prioritized. While I'm not sure she's reached the same kind of "I'm not ready yet" stage that Luffy did after Shanks became all lopsided, everything about O-tama indicates to me that she's decided on her path and is committed to it - she WANTS to become a kunoichi. And, to my mind, that necessitates training that she has not had yet, which means a mentor (Raizo, Shinobu, etc.), which means a strong likelihood of a few more years minimum in Wano.
I would put absolutely everyone in Big Mom's care. Totland is a Paradise for New World standards (and certain Government-ruled regions). The only real downside is the fact that Big Mom won't let you leave once joined and of course her random rampages. But those factors will be easily resolved once the arc is done and she comes to terms with her childhood memories. At least I'm convinced that's where she's heading right now as a character. She won't remain an antagonist for much longer, she won't be a major obstacle in the big war.
As for Tama, it's 50:50 for me. Either we get a boring repeat of Luffy telling Tama to wait a bit on Wano, again mimicking Ace, or Big Mom invites her to experience Totland for a bit (obviously with the option to leave at any point). She gets to see the world, is under the protection of a Yonkou, in Yonkou territory. That's a reasonable conclusion, especially with her already flipping out at the sight of an apple.
Think of it as a child visiting an amusement park.
Even at her most benign, Linlin is a deeply troubled individual. Her strength is monstrous, she has a habit of using it to force her will on others (beating a wild animal until it willingly serves as a mount), and while generally good-natured, she is capable of wild mood swings when things do not go her way. We also have no idea whether her "Food Rage" mode is something she is even capable of keeping in check, which makes her a constant threat to those around her. Her family and crew, for better or worse, are used to dealing with it, but that doesn't make it safe. Add in the many twisted personalities amongst Big Mom's children and, even if a Totland ruled by "Good Linlin" could be considered safer than one ruled by "Bad Linlin", I still wouldn't call it safe.