Hey. Wow. Thanks :)
So, first of all, the question is really if she caused herself that cancer, although I really can't believe it. I know some disease can be caused by stress though.
But how unfair cancer is. Her life was from my point of view kinda healthy already. No alcohol, no drugs, no late nights out, no sport but she goes out, walks, see people, she even eats vegetables and fruits ! On the other side, you have me, I do most of the 'bad' things and not the 'good' ones. So to hear her putting even more pressure on herself, on her life when I basically live mine as I want to is just… hard.
I understand the pursue of happiness, but it shouldn't be a life threatening quest. How can someone possibly be happy with this sword of Damocles hanging over their head ?
Then, I totally accept the fact that one can't be forever "happy" forever (smiling, warm and fuzzy inside, rainbow, sparkles, whatever). I get angry, yell, cry, and a little after, my heart feels lighter. But I think that my friend is a little different regarding her happiness.
My friend is the kind of girl that always smiles and never say what's on her mind because she doesn't want to upset anyone and because she's rather forget a problem than face it. When my friend talks about looking for happiness, it means not arguing with her boyfriend, accepting everything the way they come, make the best of everything. When my friend refers to happiness she wants, she always refers to anime because, in my opinion, the kind of happiness she seeks cannot exist.
My friend has a group of people she call friends with whom she is that sort of anime-character-mascot-cliché, she does poses, and always smiles, and laughs, and make people laugh and smile and everyone is happy, yay, and I hate it.
I'm a pretty honest person and when I started hanging with my friend, when I saw her with her friends, when I saw the person she was becoming for them, we had to talk.
Basically, now she knows I hate it, and with me at least she is honest, at times.
That's for the background.
When she first told me that she gave herself that cancer because she was unhappy, I tried to make her understand that in was unhealthy for her to think like that, that one can't be always 'happy', that it was okay to be sad sometimes, angry even, that trying to be always happy would be just as stressful as her life before, but she just wouldn't listen.
I'm already condescending enough with her so I didn't want to be too hard on her because she was sick.
But now ? Should I tell her how I feel ? Should I tell her boyfriend how his request felt to me ?
Or is it better (for the ones that matter) to do as told, ignore, and let it go ?