Confession Session - LOCK THIS THREAD

Purple Hermit

Purple which isn't that purple anymore, whats your definition of introvert person?

Hey man this is amethyst lol, my birth stone color. It's a lighter shade of purple.

Anyway more or less that you tend to prefer solitary activities and that you tend not to engage in group activities, that you can exert a lot of energy within your own self but not so much in groups. This doesn't necessarily make it worse off than shyness as defined by you, but it can just like with Coby's example right above your post. That you can be comfortable with a lack of societal engagement and are incapable of reevaluating yourself may be more detrimental than being uncomfortable with it and wanting to change, as per your definition.

Of course, that's also veering into the realm of assholery in general though.

Carmilla

@Nolus:

I'm satisfied with myself right now. I've come a long way from one year ago (even if my mom and brother won't admit it) and I feel like a happier person. Although I still have some downs, and they quite bother me.

! You see, I've had this "inner me" in myself for a long long time. Let me explain:The inner me is still me, but she's more confident, courageous and social. She's someone I'd wanted to become for the longest time.I want to be tougher. I want my friends to look at me and say "You are really cool and it's great having you around!". A niche as it sounds, I would still melt if someone said "You're so different from other girls" because truth to be told, I want to be different.I want to make a difference. I want to be a brave and confident person I imagine myself to be. I don't want to be frail and weak.I don't want to feel envy or other bad feelings when my friends talk about girls. I don't want to feel bad that one of them is getting a girlfriend. Is it right? Is this wanting to become better or an entirely different person? Is this a bad thing to strive for? Or is it what they call becoming a better human?

I'm feeling envious, cause I wanna have that kind of motivation and goals~Though I've some of them.And it's not bad thing in any way imo…

--- Update From New Post Merge ---

I'm quite social. And I can have lot of courage. I dun really consider myself as shy.
I am not alone or in a shell. I have friends and love spending time with em. But few of them at a time. Like max 3 e.g.

But I just can't stand being in a group, even if they are all talking about one piece. It's not just my thought, I feel it, you know... It's like an allergy. And I just enjoy that atmosphere with few people, one on one conversations, cause I 'see' person more. And I love seeing person as fast as I can, is it that wrong Coby? You shouldn't be angry when some1 doesn't agree with you though.

And there aren't slightly different kinds of introversion, there are just slightly different people imo. If 1 is antisocial AND introvert. You can't assume that all of them are like that.

Purple Hermit

@Carmilla:

I'm quite social. And I can have lot of courage. I dun really consider myself as shy.
I am not alone or in a shell. I have friends and love spending time with em. But few of them at a time. Like max 3 e.g.

But I just can't stand being in a group, even if they are all talking about one piece. It's not just my thought, I feel it, you know… It's like an allergy. And I just enjoy that atmosphere with few people, one on one conversations, cause I 'see' person more. And I love seeing person as fast as I can, is it that wrong Coby? You shouldn't be angry when some1 doesn't agree with you though.

And there aren't slightly different kinds of introversion, there are just slightly different people imo. If 1 is antisocial AND introvert. You can't assume that all of them are like that.

I think you're missing Coby's POV here. It's not that he doesn't agree with people but purely that those people completely disregard any sort of short chit chat about stuff. Talking about One Piece for all you know could be that sort of thing. People shouldn't be around purely just to have incredibly deep and culturally sensitive topics, and it appears that those fellows that Coby has met seem to purely and solely interested in that sort of thing, giving them an air of arrogance.

Coby

America also put's a lot of cultural value on being outgoing and a leader of sorts so it's natural for a lot of people to see some more reserved people in a different life then you may in a different culture.

cooldud

@Coby:

For one thing I just hate the concept of introversion or extroversion as a whole so that bothers me

Why do you hate that concept?

@Coby:

and I guess it just stems from the majorityof the introverts I've interacted with offline and online have acted as if being introverted makes you better than extroverts though that same concept goes both ways.

Thanks for recognising one fallacy in that argument. Here's another: you cannot project the attitude of one introvert, or the majority of the ones you've met onto everyone who self-identifies as introverted. There is nothing inherently better or worse about being an introvert.

For instance I have a bunch of Greek friends and a majority of them are left-handed. I cannot use that to claim that a majority of Greeks in general are left-handed.

@Coby:

Also a lot of them have been oblivious to certain social p's and q's and are fairly anti-social which is probably a completely seperate issue than actual introversion

I tend to think that being anti-social is an extreme form of introversion. But yeah, why is being oblivious of social norms such a bad thing? Or being anti-social, for that matter. It is a personal choice, after all.

@Coby:

but whenever I see them complain about small talk and not getting into deep conversations I can't help but wonder how they think youre supposed to get to those deep conversations. You don't just walk about to somebody and ask them about what they think about the current socio economic problems facing impoverished children in Zimbabwe, you ask them about their day or the new haircut they have (though in theory they would not be apporaching them in the first place). I'm not an introvert or an extrovert at all, I'm just me and depending on the situation I may be reserved or outgoing. I guess it's just a personal problem of mine that I know is wrong

I understand the necessity of small talk in social situations, but I find it tedious and wish that communication mechanisms were improved to the point where you could get to the point directly instead of beating around the bush. As a result, I would rather not talk about anything, rather than talk about your day or your haircut before moving to the economy of Zimbabwe. Consequently, I don't really do parties. Especially ones with lots of strangers.

[[/FONT]QUOTE=Coby;3162257]I guess it could also have something to do with the cultural values of America as well I guess. Yeah. American culture has this fascination with extroverted people.

taboo

@cooldud:

I tend to think that being anti-social is an extreme form of introversion. But yeah, why is being oblivious of social norms such a bad thing? Or being anti-social, for that matter. It is a personal choice, after all.

i think the biggest thing is just that loved ones dont want an introvert to miss out on some of the joys life has to offer. and I really do think there is such a thing as being unhealthily introverted

cooldud

@taboo:

i think the biggest thing is just that loved ones dont want an introvert to miss out on some of the joys life has to offer. and I really do think there is such a thing as being unhealthily introverted

That's true. But being unhealthily introverted is a more extreme case. Just as being unhealthily extroverted is. Don't you think?

General introversion, the way I see it, is unwillingness to connect with new people. As long as that unwillingness is not crippling and one has mechanisms to get around those enough to have a functional and satisfying life, I don't see an issue with it.

Purple Hermit

tl;dr Generalities and extremities never fit except in the cases that they do.

Coby

I know that my views on introversion and extroversion are flawed and stated that in my posts.

TheCrystalShip

@cooldud:

General introversion, the way I see it, is unwillingness to connect with new people.

Then I'm the biggest extrovert in the world, LOL.

Print Error

@Purple:

tl;dr Generalities and extremities never fit except in the cases that they do.

Everything is either a false binary or it isn't.

TheCrystalShip

@Print:

Everything is either a false binary or it isn't.

At first I was going to correct the false binary inherent to your statement before realizing it was a joke.

Coby

It bothers me that these people think i'm racist when it shouldn't matter.
Math makes me cry.

Panda Bear

@Print:

Everything is either a false binary or it isn't.

There are ten different kinds of people in the world: those that recognize when a joke only works in text, rather than spoken, and those that don't.

Shipmate

I have no problem socializing with people but I prefer spending time alone.
I guess I don't really need a label for that. ^_^

Foolio

@Panda:

There are ten different kinds of people in the world: those that recognize when a joke only works in text, rather than spoken, and those that don't.

Apparently there is another kind – the kind that doesn't realize that even in written form, the word "ten" is not sufficient in order for this joke to work.

Shipmate

There are seven billion kinds of people in the world: I and everyone else.

TheCrystalShip

@Shipmate:

There are seven billion kinds of people in the world: I and everyone else.

Those aren't KINDS of people, those are "individual people", and we all know there's no such thing.

Panda Bear

@Foolio:

Apparently there is another kind – the kind that doesn't realize that even in written form, the word "ten" is not sufficient in order for this joke to work.

I stand corrected.

Make that eleven kinds of people, then.

Prismeru

Hey guys, i'm here to

sees a beaten dead horse

Oh, okay.

Oh god, i'm talking about the joke of the kinds of people. Please don't think i'm misinterpreting things.

Carmilla

@cooldud:

General introversion, the way I see it, is unwillingness to connect with new people.

It defends on a situation, you know.

cooldud

@TheCrystalShip:

Then I'm the biggest extrovert in the world, LOL.

Well, you might very well be.

Last count shows you have 54 friends and 71 pages of VMs.

As Carmilla says:

@Carmilla:

It defends on a situation, you know.

Of course it does, m'lady. Of course it does.

Purple Hermit

@TheCrystalShip:

Those aren't KINDS of people, those are "individual people", and we all know there's no such thing.

Why can't I be a kind of perosn?

I'm the "Purple Hermit" kind.

TheCrystalShip

@cooldud:

Well, you might very well be.

Last count shows you have 54 friends and 71 pages of VMs.

Not gonna stop till I have 8,000 (Twitter) followers.

cooldud

@TheCrystalShip:

Not gonna stop till I have 8,000 (Twitter) followers.

The fact that you're on twitter and comfortable with the world reading your thoughts already speaks a lot.

Noqanky

Isn't the definition of introvert/extrovert that you obtain comfort/energy/motivation from being on your own/with people? Pointing it out since I don't think introversion implies that you won't talk to people or put yourself out there. Introversion just implies that you cherish the alone, personal time to recharge batteries, while extroverts need social interaction to pretty much feel motivated.

I speak as someone who has been labelled introverted in several professional scales and items … the main idea being that as an introvert, I can go to parties and interact with people but at the end of the day I will need alone time to regain comfort and energy. Or at least that's the definition I recall learning, I think it was from the Myers-Briggs.

Purple Hermit

@Noqanky:

Isn't the definition of introvert/extrovert that you obtain comfort/energy/motivation from being on your own/with people? Pointing it out since I don't think introversion implies that you won't talk to people or put yourself out there. Introversion just implies that you cherish the alone, personal time to recharge batteries, while extroverts need social interaction to pretty much feel motivated.

I speak as someone who has been labelled introverted in several professional scales and items … the main idea being that as an introvert, I can go to parties and interact with people but at the end of the day I will need alone time to regain comfort and energy. Or at least that's the definition I recall learning, I think it was from the Myers-Briggs.

I think that's the general MBTI definition, yeah, but I don't think that's the correct definition in and of itself as per used in psychology. It's more that extroverts are more often than not very outgoing and enjoy time in large groups versus solitude, while introverts prefer their solitude over social engagements.

Hiroy

@cooldud:

The fact that you're on twitter and comfortable with the world reading your thoughts already speaks a lot.

I know right? It's like a message board. On the internet.

Noqanky

@Purple:

I think that's the general MBTI definition, yeah, but I don't think that's the correct definition in and of itself as per used in psychology. It's more that extroverts are more often than not very outgoing and enjoy time in large groups versus solitude, while introverts prefer their solitude over social engagements.

I see. Appreciate the clarification!

Purple Hermit

@Noqanky:

I see. Appreciate the clarification!

Aye. I'm not actually quite sure where the common definition became the battery recharge thing, but I think it helps with people to cope with the idea of solitude by saying that "introverts aren't always introverted! We just need more recharge time rather than feeding off of other people!" When really that sort of statement is more about how we fit on the gradient between introversion and extroversion.

For a bit of extra reading on Jung's original ideas on the topic you can read some stuff here: http://philosophy.lander.edu/ethics/jung.html

zachri

@cooldud:

The fact that you're on twitter and comfortable with the world reading your thoughts already speaks a lot.

I spend most of my time on twitter dealing with beliebers who hate me.
Oh well.

cooldud

@Hiroy:

I know right? It's like a message board. On the internet.

It is? Last I checked, it was a a social networking and microblogging site. I doubt people use it exclusively for it's DM service.

TheCrystalShip

I feel like the true usefulness of Twitter is tapping into news stories and other social phenomena before they occur. Or rather, before they occur within the public consciousness. Ben Franklin said that time is money, which is a disgusting notion if you really get into it. So what he should have said is that "time is information". Every moment is a moment when you could be learning something that you didn't know.

And Twitter is the pinnacle of high-speed information processing, outside of metadata (which is of course inaccessible). Kind of like the weird "homeless network" from Sherlock. The greatest danger is that, traditionally, punctuality is traded for journalistic integrity, as in the case of the Hollywood Reporter. In terms of Twitter, this can translate into premature conclusions, such as in the case of the Reddit Boston Bomber fiasco, and other sorts of correlation/causation mishaps. But unlike in the case of a publication, I don't think that Twitter is directly responsible for this. Twitter doesn't give you facts, it gives you trends, and from there you make your own interpretations. And of course, you can kind of reverse the equation. By that I mean, take advantage of the nature of Twitter in order to disseminate information. So while it's not the coolest thing in the world, I think it's very useful.

Arei

@Nolus:

I'm satisfied with myself right now. I've come a long way from one year ago (even if my mom and brother won't admit it) and I feel like a happier person.
Although I still have some downs, and they quite bother me.

! You see, I've had this "inner me" in myself for a long long time. Let me explain:
The inner me is still me, but she's more confident, courageous and social. She's someone I'd wanted to become for the longest time.
I want to be tougher. I want my friends to look at me and say "You are really cool and it's great having you around!". A niche as it sounds, I would still melt if someone said "You're so different from other girls" because truth to be told, I want to be different.
! I want to make a difference. I want to be a brave and confident person I imagine myself to be. I don't want to be frail and weak.
I don't want to feel envy or other bad feelings when my friends talk about girls. I don't want to feel bad that one of them is getting a girlfriend.
! Is it right? Is this wanting to become better or an entirely different person? Is this a bad thing to strive for? Or is it what they call becoming a better human?

It's a great thing. Personal growth is always a good thing. There's never anything wrong with striving to better yourself and, while you may "change" the way you act/see things, you really aren't changing "who you are" in the most personal sense. Humans are all about evolution and adaptability, we wouldn't survive if we didn't go through such internal changes. It's how we grow and better ourselves. I'm glad to hear that you are feeling better, I know things have been crazy for you >__<

Chrissie

@Nolus:

I'm satisfied with myself right now. I've come a long way from one year ago (even if my mom and brother won't admit it) and I feel like a happier person.
Although I still have some downs, and they quite bother me.

! You see, I've had this "inner me" in myself for a long long time. Let me explain:
The inner me is still me, but she's more confident, courageous and social. She's someone I'd wanted to become for the longest time.
I want to be tougher. I want my friends to look at me and say "You are really cool and it's great having you around!". A niche as it sounds, I would still melt if someone said "You're so different from other girls" because truth to be told, I want to be different.
! I want to make a difference. I want to be a brave and confident person I imagine myself to be. I don't want to be frail and weak.
I don't want to feel envy or other bad feelings when my friends talk about girls. I don't want to feel bad that one of them is getting a girlfriend.
! Is it right? Is this wanting to become better or an entirely different person? Is this a bad thing to strive for? Or is it what they call becoming a better human?

Very happy and proud for you :) And I am sure you will keep blooming and growing stronger and more confident. You are a very unique and sweet girl and I am sure you will achieve your goals and leave a good impact and a wonderful story behind you. Keep rocking Nolus :)

TheCrystalShip

@Nolus:

I'm satisfied with myself right now. I've come a long way from one year ago (even if my mom and brother won't admit it) and I feel like a happier person.
Although I still have some downs, and they quite bother me.

! You see, I've had this "inner me" in myself for a long long time. Let me explain:
The inner me is still me, but she's more confident, courageous and social. She's someone I'd wanted to become for the longest time.
I want to be tougher. I want my friends to look at me and say "You are really cool and it's great having you around!". A niche as it sounds, I would still melt if someone said "You're so different from other girls" because truth to be told, I want to be different.
! I want to make a difference. I want to be a brave and confident person I imagine myself to be. I don't want to be frail and weak.
I don't want to feel envy or other bad feelings when my friends talk about girls. I don't want to feel bad that one of them is getting a girlfriend.
! Is it right? Is this wanting to become better or an entirely different person? Is this a bad thing to strive for? Or is it what they call becoming a better human?

You sound like me. :)

And I know that you're going to become the "you" that you want to be. Just keep on chuggin'~

Print Error

@zachri:

I spend most of my time on twitter dealing with beliebers who hate me.
Oh well.

My Twitter feed is mostly activism and friends. It's like a toned-down Tumblr. Though I don't really do so much of the activism anymore - a combination of not having the time, and feeling that sometimes there are better ways to achieve things than shouting about them in a twitterstorm. My own feed is therefore mostly bad jokes and thrilling accounts of my daily train adventures. I try never to mention the name of Justin lest it cause Candlejack to appear.

Crystal's right though - there's really very little to compare to Twitter in terms of live news. This applies to the big stuff all the way down too - so you can find out breaking international news and also find out why your train is delayed. It's my most visited place on the net, aside from here.

Does take quite a bit of getting used to the character limit, but it also forces you to be concise and not go on for ages and ages without necessarily saying anything with much meaning leaving those reading wondering quite what the point of all the text is when the meaning could be made much simpler in fewer words with a character limit to encourage it.

TheCrystalShip

@Print:

Though I don't really do so much of the activism anymore - a combination of not having the time, and feeling that sometimes there are better ways to achieve things than shouting about them in a twitterstorm.

Activism =/= Shouting. It's sad that the two have become synonymous during the course of the SJ Wars.

Print Error

@Nolus:

I'm satisfied with myself right now. I've come a long way from one year ago (even if my mom and brother won't admit it) and I feel like a happier person.
Although I still have some downs, and they quite bother me.

! You see, I've had this "inner me" in myself for a long long time. Let me explain:
The inner me is still me, but she's more confident, courageous and social. She's someone I'd wanted to become for the longest time.
I want to be tougher. I want my friends to look at me and say "You are really cool and it's great having you around!". A niche as it sounds, I would still melt if someone said "You're so different from other girls" because truth to be told, I want to be different.
! I want to make a difference. I want to be a brave and confident person I imagine myself to be. I don't want to be frail and weak.
I don't want to feel envy or other bad feelings when my friends talk about girls. I don't want to feel bad that one of them is getting a girlfriend.
! Is it right? Is this wanting to become better or an entirely different person? Is this a bad thing to strive for? Or is it what they call becoming a better human?

That sounds to me exactly how life should be - growing, changing, developing, coming more into focus. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be the best you you can be - to live up to your potential as much as you can - and if anyone tells you there is, they're probably projecting their struggles with their own demons.

–- Update From New Post Merge ---

@TheCrystalShip:

Activism =/= Shouting. It's sad that the two have become synonymous during the course of the SJ Wars.

I know, and that was somewhat discourteous of me. A lot of activism isn't like that - though, there is a strong element of 'preaching to the choir' about it. But Twitter is particularly good at encouraging the 'pile-on' kind, where the person being criticised en mass will just get defensive because they're not getting a chance to think.

TheCrystalShip

@Print:

I know, and that was somewhat discourteous of me. A lot of activism isn't like that - though, there is a strong element of 'preaching to the choir' about it. But Twitter is particularly good at encouraging the 'pile-on' kind, where the person being criticised en mass will just get defensive because they're not getting a chance to think.

And that's exactly what needs to be changed.

Coby

American history disgusts me but I don't hate America.

Medical Orbit

I've seen a lot of people who claim to be misanthropes on the Internet, and I think that's kind of a contradiction…if you hate people, why are you willingly interacting with them on social sites in your own free time? If I hated people, I'd find an isolated place to live in and I wouldn't have Internet accounts, numbers in my phone, etc. A lot of them even have friends...and I'd think friendship is the opposite of hatred.

I also know people who claim to have no friends, when their friends list on Facebook says otherwise...

korobka

Sounds a lot like my sister. She claims to be a misanthrope, yet I'm pretty sure she was making friends in college left and right from her very first week there. When I pointed out the paradox of that, she said "Oh, well you aren't misanthropic because you don't spend as much time as I do around people." Shoulda seen that one coming. Meanwhile, as I already said, I haven't made any new friends in person for over a decade. (As pathetic as that may sound.) That's more out of nervousness and not knowing what to talk about than her supposed "misanthropy". Speaking of, I don't know if I've really made any progress in that area, but I've definitely got another opportunity, now that I'm doing a film project with this girl who seems to be about my age. She was also wearing a Sonic shirt during the last class, so she's clearly not afraid to flaunt her geekiness, like I am.

Foolio

I think it's actually a really interesting idea to consider misanthropy in the context of online interaction. Like I'm sure there are extremely anti-social people who flourish on the internet. But if misanthropy is truly a dislike of people in general, then do online representations count? What makes a person a "person" in that respect? Like, should a misanthrope also hate chat bots if they hold a sufficiently human conversation?

I dunno maybe I'm rambling but it's interesting.

Mr.point

When i tell some one that i hate anime ,
he wonders.
why ?

Note : I love manga more than anime.

Print Error

You can have many different kinds of misanthropy though.

I think very little of humanity (especially after doing a History degree) and think it would be a net benefit to the universe if we all wiped ourselves out somehow. But on the other hand, I'm very much a people person and really dislike conflict. I don't necessarily see these things as conflicting - humanity as a species is a different context to making and having friends.

Panda Bear

@Foolio:

I think it's actually a really interesting idea to consider misanthropy in the context of online interaction. Like I'm sure there are extremely anti-social people who flourish on the internet. But if misanthropy is truly a dislike of people in general, then do online representations count? What makes a person a "person" in that respect? Like, should a misanthrope also hate chat bots if they hold a sufficiently human conversation?

I dunno maybe I'm rambling but it's interesting.

What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets.

While a bot, on the other hand, is a miserable little pile of code. Therefore a bot is not a man, and a misanthrope should not hate them.

QED

Oathkeeper

I have another confession to make, a bit more serious this time…

I hate the Boondocks and its fans. Im lighter on this lately though.

Hiroy

Got no problems with you hating me, so there you go.

Foolio

@Panda:

What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets.

While a bot, on the other hand, is a miserable little pile of code. Therefore a bot is not a man, and a misanthrope should not hate them.

QED

I know you're joking but I was trying to get at the abstraction between an actual person and the text they write that gets posted into the void of the intarwebs.
Edit: Guys, please don't use this thread to ask random question about the forum.