@Monkey:
One more year and then basically it's over. College is a whole different world, and considering you write perfect English and apparently good Swedish, your prospects for college may even involve going abroad to even more tolerant places (both those languages for instance) so it would be like even cooler college. Plus getting away from your home town world and all that jazz. Assuming of course you're a good student lol, but if you can learn all this you must be.
Think of THAT. Forget this dumb bitch and all these boring people collecting like so much lint at the bottom of the Carpathian basin. You have keys to access the big ol' world and FREEDOM.
Def talk to Chrissie, not about the identity issues but that same sense of suffocating under a bunch of yokels, and freedom prospects and all that. You're almost there girl.
I'm a good student, or so my teachers say. I've had almost perfect grades every year and I never had problems with learning. Although the only thing I'm truly fond of and good at is learning languages. I'm currently learning French in school (and home in form of reading literature) and Swedish by myself.
I await that glorious day when I can finally say "I'll never see her stupid face again". It still seems a little far away though and a lot can happen till that.
@Luffyko:
A SIN?! What a disgusting person…
Seriously, ignore her. I know that is really hard, but you should try at least. One year seems really long, but just think it's over after that and you don't need to waste your time with horrible people like her anymore =)
I tried, but even so, she continued. I ignored her for like a year, but I guess she saw that I was distracted every time and liked it.
@Gliblord:
Don't ignore her, that'll only make the bully pester her more. Turnabout is fair play; isn't it about time she should be taught who's really the one who has something to be ashamed of?
"Well, now, for someone who hates me so much, you sure are obsessed with me."
Yeah, I've thought about clever comebacks like that… every time after the "bullying" happened. In that moment, I just can't think of anything.
@TheCrystalShip:
Yeah, it's probably internalized shame. Chances are, she has a big lesbian crush on Nolus.
Oh please no I don't want this! She has a boyfriend anyways.
@Gliblord:
Then a more realistic approach might be to just do an eyeroll at her.
Believe me, that's what I mostly do. It's just that… well, imagine this situation (actually happened).
The class organized some kind of a party for another (it's a tradition here). I missed half of it because of a swimming competition. Needless to say, between the two things, I didn't eat anything, so I was very hungry.
Party's over, I noticed some bread with onions and such. So I proceeded to get myself one to calm my stomach till I get home. I bite and then comes she, and comments "Oh god, how huge you bit from that bread" It's hard to describe. It was more like "What's wrong with you, why did you bite so big oh god."
Also, whenever I laugh a little louder than completely silent, she's like "oh god what's wrong with you". She doesn't say that to herself, she says it TO ME!
It's really hard to have a nice laugh or just be comfortable with her around.
@The:
Nolus, have you ever resisted or fought back in any way? Because being passive, ignoring her, or trying to just be light about it doesn't help.
Scream at her, be passionate, defend yourself, cry. Be alive, show you're a person. It can be easy to become complacent with feeling helpless about it, but if this person so deeply gives you such anxiety, you should really try to counter it. Talk to your teachers, a counselor, the head of the school even– involve her parents if you have to-- do whatever you can, from all angles, to try to make it a safe environment for you as a student because that should be the school's priority.
Just, whatever you're doing now, your coping mechanisms here? Change your routine. Because you should not and do not want to go through this for another year. Just fight back. Like, I haven't seen earlier posts on this subject so maybe you have, but if it's still happening then it wasn't enough. It is not fair to yourself to just think about waiting it out.
Well, there was this one time which I'm not particularly proud of.
I basically told her to "you son of a bitch go to hell". I never ever said something like this before. I'm not that type. I use some cursewords from time to time, but those are nothing like that. Also, it seemed to have backfired a little. I felt really awful for a week (not to mention the rest of the day). She was picking on me again of course, but it still wasn't the right thing to do I feel…
She then responded "Oh yeah?" and then proceeded to tell the whole class how I said her to go to fucking hell. Since then, I'm even more anxious when I see her and try to avoid contact as much as possible. It's not easy... especially when she somehow get's in front of me in class and looks at me just for the sake of making me irritated when I try to pay attention. I can't ignore her at times like that and can't say "leave me alone" because, well, it's class.
@The:
Just don't like, I dunno, throw a chair at her head. Or maybe throw a chair at her head.
I actually had that urge many times heh. I don't want to damage school property though.
@Monkey:
People like this girl don't get ashamed unless Nolus somehow captures the popularity of the majority of her influential classmates. And if this person is some religious nut than it's hopeless no matter what. And engaging people like this is what they want, how they thrive, and how they escalate things to even worse stuff they desire more of. It would just make things worse.
Not going to happen. I'm unable to do that, and don't really want to.
Oh I doubt she's religious. At least not Christian. She once was kind enough to make another girl cry (who was at that time very religious) by shouting something bad at her (about religion or something like that, I can't really remember). All during class. Needless to say, our teacher got angry but nothing else really happened afterwards.
So no, she isn't religious, she hasn't shown any sign of that.
@The:
But, like others have already touched on, stand up for yourself, Nolus! Don't let people walk over you! Slap dem bitches (with their own medicine)!
I'm afraid she would slap me back with double the force right away.
If at least a teacher of mine who likes me was around and I could tell her to leave me alone forever maybe… oh screw it, she's a bitch with the teachers as well... and they can't do anything about her apparently...
Thank you all for the advice. I'll be sure to read this thread before the first day of school starts to collect some courage.