Oh god, the doctors confirmed that my nephew has Meningitis and he's taken a turn for the worse. He's in the ICU now. Everything seemed fine these last days. Why does this have to happen to someone so young? Can't i just trade my life for his? He still hasn't lived. Everythings sucks and the world is rotten.
How was your Day 2 (general chat)
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Working thru some stuff. Dunno how long i will be here.
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My boss is off so I've been putting out fires all morning.
I feel like a goddamn hero.
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Oh god, the doctors confirmed that my nephew has Meningitis and he's taken a turn for the worse. He's in the ICU now. Everything seemed fine these last days. Why does this have to happen to someone so young? Can't i just trade my life for his? He still hasn't lived. Everythings sucks and the world is rotten.
I hope everything turns for the better and the doctors can treat your nephew. I'm sorry to hear about what your family is going through and I hope you all can remain strong, especially your nephew.
Everything's Eventual…
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I hope everything turns for the better and the doctors can treat your nephew. I'm sorry to hear about what your family is going through and I hope you all can remain strong, especially your nephew.
Thanks Outerspec. I really appreciate it. It's just that it's so fucking unfair :(
And i wake up totally drained, totally sad and just looking for a break when work kicks me in the nuts. Well, not kicks me but demands a lot of attention. I just made a, let's call it breakthrough, that i've been striving for for months. It's good but, god, i don't have the heart for it right now…but i have to.
Can't just the world stop being so overwhelming right now please?
Working thru some stuff. Dunno how long i will be here.
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Thanks Outerspec. I really appreciate it. It's just that it's so fucking unfair :(
And i wake up totally drained, totally sad and just looking for a break when work kicks me in the nuts. Well, not kicks me but demands a lot of attention. I just made a, let's call it breakthrough, that i've been striving for for months. It's good but, god, i don't have the heart for it right now…but i have to.
Can't just the world stop being so overwhelming right now please?
You have to grit your teeth and push through. A storm always passes and I understand you want it to be over with now because it's hard, but when it's finally over and you come out on the other side you'll have a better appreciation of the good times.
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This post is deleted!
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You have to grit your teeth and push through. A storm always passes and I understand you want it to be over with now because it's hard, but when it's finally over and you come out on the other side you'll have a better appreciation of the good times.
Thank you Outerspec. I really appreciate it.
@ali:
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I don't know Ali, I don't think self-medicating is the issue here.
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Thanks Outerspec. I really appreciate it. It's just that it's so fucking unfair :(
And i wake up totally drained, totally sad and just looking for a break when work kicks me in the nuts. Well, not kicks me but demands a lot of attention. I just made a, let's call it breakthrough, that i've been striving for for months. It's good but, god, i don't have the heart for it right now…but i have to.
Can't just the world stop being so overwhelming right now please?
Stay strong! And remember, if you need e-hugs, here's the place!
Here's one right now! ~hug~ Hang in there!
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Stay strong! And remember, if you need e-hugs, here's the place!
Here's one right now! ~hug~ Hang in there!
Oh, thanks Nolus. I'm looking for things to take my mind off of it. Tomorrow will tell if it worked or i'm going to Confession Session…but i really appreciate all of your concern.
Edit: Did that sound dangerous? I swear it isn't.
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What I feared the most, my aunt called my house and said that the doctors told her that my father will not last long. I don´t know if he will be back tomorrow.
And I can´t call him.
I just want to wake up from this nightmare.
When AP used to be good:
NEVER FORGET !!
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What I feared the most, my aunt called my house and said that the doctors told her that my father will not last long. I don´t know if he will be back tomorrow.
And I can´t call him.
I just want to wake up from this nightmare.
Is there any way you can visit him or are you too far away? If I were you I'd drop everything and get to that hospital as fast as I could and meet up with the rest of the family. I don't know how close you are with your father and all but from your posts you seem close enough to care and worry so, yeah, a visit to the hospital is highly recommended though I'm sure you've thought about it already.
Everything's Eventual…
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What I feared the most, my aunt called my house and said that the doctors told her that my father will not last long. I don´t know if he will be back tomorrow.
And I can´t call him.
I just want to wake up from this nightmare.
Is there any way you can visit him or are you too far away? If I were you I'd drop everything and get to that hospital as fast as I could and meet up with the rest of the family. I don't know how close you are with your father and all but from your posts you seem close enough to care and worry so, yeah, a visit to the hospital is highly recommended though I'm sure you've thought about it already.
Absolutely what Outerspec said. Drop whatever you're doing and get over there as soon as you can. If he means that much to you, then you have to drop everything you do and see him if possible. Nothing should matter more save for the obvious things like not getting killed getting there. Deal with the bereavement stuff at work later
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My days been annoying, my band has got an upcoming gig and I had to use the office computer to design custom flyers here. My boss found out and got pissed off (can't blame him really) and has been giving me the stink eye all day. Thank goodness he left early cos his passive aggressive vibes were getting tiresome.
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Thanks for the concern. I appreciate that.
I can´t visit him because he was hospitalized in Rio de Janeiro and I live in São Paulo (6 hours by bus). He called me today and said he was discharged from the hospital today and is feeling better.
He had a kidney infection, what we fear most is that this infection becomes a kidney dysfunction..
I still want to talk with him in person…
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Thank God, that is great news Captain. I'm very glad he's feeling better and I hope that he's actually physically better and it's not just a feeling. The hospital releasing him is a good sign that this is the case and I hope you can see him in person soon.
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It appears My Nephew can stand in bed and eat by himself now although he's still in ICU. I'm still worried, tho. Hope everything goes better for him.
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Things are looking up!
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I saw Think Like A Man Too and The Purge: Anarchy in theaters today. The first movie I found pretty funny because I'm easy like that and the 2nd movie was quite the disappointment. Mainly because the idea and themes presented in the movie could be handled so much better if put in the hands of a better director or crew!
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The heat isn't ideal. Nobody does their best work while worrying about dripping on someone.
The winter feels much more conducive for lovin
Yeah, that's also true. Winter is a much better season. But I stand by that loving is the best kind of heat stroke you can get~
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Got a new car today. 2012 Honda Accord with 32,000 miles on it. A gray/pewter-ish color with pretty much all the features I could want. Made a $8000 down payment with $250 monthly payments. Altogether, after taxes and fees, it was about $21,000.
Honestly, I couldn't be happier with the purchase.
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Riding a bike whilst tears are running down your cheek is certainly a poetic moment.
On the other hand, it's kinda hard to see the road like that.
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I'm at the beach, My family had already booked a trip before my nephew was sick so we are here. I don't really like the beach but my family likes it so…well. Also, everyone is hot around here. Makes one too conscious about his own uglyness.
Working thru some stuff. Dunno how long i will be here.
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I'm at the beach, My family had already booked a trip before my nephew was sick so we are here. I don't really like the beach but my family likes it so…well. Also, everyone is hot around here. Makes one too conscious about his own uglyness.
I hope you aren't talking about yourself, because if so, I'd advise new glasses and possibly a brand new mirror~
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My father called me today, he said he was feeling fine and will be back on tuesday. I can´t wait…
I don't know if I'm old enough to endure his death...Maybe if I´m 30.
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Working thru some stuff. Dunno how long i will be here.
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Oh, thanks Nolus. But stop or i'll get all Tsundere.
:3
So I came home early from work because I'm feeling like crap today. It's like, I want to sleep, but I'm afraid of my dreams. Crying for a whole day really didn't do that much good.
Feeling physically ill probably doesn't help either. -
Realized that my new phone is going to need a micro sim card.
So now i'm pondering if it's smart to just take like a sharp knife and do a little surgery on my old sim card.
Oh and Noly what's making you so sad? Man troubles?
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Oh and Noly what's making you so sad? Man troubles?
Yeah, pretty much. I'm really exhausted even though I slept ~8 hours. Even the world seem to be mocking me with dreams, songs and whatnot.
It's also not helping that there's a guy (whom I recently met over the internet via some friends) who seems to hold me in higher regard than my love at the moment.
Is it too much to ask that my love actually do… love-ey stuff with me? Over the internet?
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Yo Nolus,
! I don't know how many relationships you've been in, but my impression of your relationship is that it's your first seriousish, intense relationship. I'm sure what I'm about to say will echo what you've heard on the board and in real life, but reinforcement can be useful. So without getting too big on the specifics (because, well, frankly I know almost nothing concerning the details), but it seems like as of late that you've been on a roller coaster of emotions. It may be that these feelings are truly brought on because your boyfriend needs to invest more time into you or at least partly the case (things are always fairly muddy in these situations), but more or less, when it comes to posts about your boyfriend they tend on the extreme, either really really happy and overly ecstatic or really really big downers, which may be because nobody really talks about times that are level, but it is a bit concerning.
! Relationships tend on a certain order of events:
1. The chase, trying to feel out if both people are interested in trying things out
2. The beginning, where both parties tend to be at the emotional high of the relationship
3. A gradual decline to a more natural state, where things are still enjoyable but not the same superb high
4. Rough patches, in part because maybe one person isn't pulling their share of the weight, some miscommunication, maybe getting a bit too comfy, or just something that knocks things out of equilibrium in general.
5. ????
6. Repeat steps 3-5
7. Profit, or maybe net loss depending on how things go
! Ideally, you want to be accustomed to a more equilibrium state rather than too high or too low. You will always end up hitting rough patches at some point, but it is how you respond and react to them that may set up conditions for how the rest of your relationship will go. If you want to aim much higher, then the cost to be paid for later may be substantially greater and bring you to a deeper low. Remember that it takes two to tango, and you need to work with him and the limitations and constraints for your relationship. Time, distance, personal space are all factors to keep in mind, and learning to balance that and addressing issues is how you tread through troubled waters.
! And while there may be a guy who'd be willing to give you everything you want when you want it, beware it being just an alluring flame only because it happens to be a bit brighter at the moment. The grass is always greener on the other side.
! well, I know from my own experience that I'm similarly overly affectionate, so I understand being fairly crazy while in a relationship, which is why I suggest keeping perspective as to what might be holding him back from giving you what you want, and if it is something unreasonable for him to be doing, then talk with him about those issues.
! I suppose if we're still going on about real talk, then long distance may be a big issue in this case, but the first thing to do is to do some introspection about what you personally and truly want and what you need to do to make that happen. Ask yourself perhaps and dig deeper into the roots of your issues, perhaps by asking yourself five "why" questions. Why are you distraught? Because your boyfriend won't do romantic things with you. Why won't/can't he do things with you? and more questions trying to dig deeper at a more root cause rather than stressing out at the surface level problem. This isn't perhaps necessary in small things but it may be useful if you really are spending a long time pining for your lover.…
well I wrote a lot more than I expected, so I'll just put the take home message here: try to keep a fairly level state. It's rough when relationships are pretty much about the exact opposite feeling, but depending on your intent with a relationship, a long lasting one requires a solid foundation from which it can grow. A good analogy I've heard is that a relationship is like tempering steel. Creating steel requires it to be hot and malleable, but in that stage it lacks actual strength. Strong steel is cooled but stable and difficult to rend.
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Started on One Piece: Unlimited World Red today. It took a little while to get used to how it plays since I hadn't played any of the other Unlimited games (though granted only 1 other tmk came to the States). Its pretty neat though, I like it. I definitely got more learning to do for sure, but once I get better I'm sure I'll love it. I do like the town building. That's always been something I enjoy.
Other than that was told to shut up and not be a little annoyed my mom has a doctor's appointment on my birthday. I'm not blaming her as its not her fault they had no other free time. Its just hurts still that my luck could be that bad. It won't be a long visit luckily, but still … I dunno.
Otherwise my day's been alright. Was woken up early because of my kitten making noise at 4 AM but that's just how kittens can be. I can't say it was a terrible day, it was decent.
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Started on One Piece: Unlimited World Red today. It took a little while to get used to how it plays since I hadn't played any of the other Unlimited games (though granted only 1 other tmk came to the States). Its pretty neat though, I like it. I definitely got more learning to do for sure, but once I get better I'm sure I'll love it. I do like the town building. That's always been something I enjoy.
Other than that was told to shut up and not be a little annoyed my mom has a doctor's appointment on my birthday. I'm not blaming her as its not her fault they had no other free time. Its just hurts still that my luck could be that bad. It won't be a long visit luckily, but still … I dunno.
Otherwise my day's been alright. Was woken up early because of my kitten making noise at 4 AM but that's just how kittens can be. I can't say it was a terrible day, it was decent.
Well, happy birthday :3
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Is it too much to ask that my love actually do… love-ey stuff with me? Over the internet?
Is he normally romantic and now suddenly isn't? Or has he always shied away from romantic expression?
If it's the latter, he just may not be the "romantic" type, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care for you. My partner and I are not really the romantic sort to show up with wine and flowers, or take moonlit walks on the beach, but we're crazy about each other. We express our love differently (through humor, for example). Is it possible that he might not be the kind of guy who is comfortable with obvious displays of affection? Is he aware that you feel neglected?
If it's the former and this behavior is new, you should definitely set aside a time to discuss the change. Try not to assume the worst; it could be something going on in his life that could be totally unrelated to your relationship.
Either way, you should talk to him about it and see if you can both come to an understanding where your needs are met as a couple.
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Today I was part of reading workshop for children in a elementary school and then I had to distribute a test for future librarians of that school.
I really liked one of the questions in the test "Name four brazilian writers and explain why you think they are/were important for the brazilian literature."
About my father….Shish..He is not feeling good and he said we will be back saturday.:sad::sad::sad:
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Nothing like working a 16 hour shift with the only break in between is a three hour class
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Well, tomorrow I'll leave Sweden. Maybe even for good. America is calling.
I'm pretty darn nervous, partly because of the entire move in general, but mostly for the flight. I'm terrified of flying, and flying from Stockholm to LA takes like 14 hours or something ridiculous like that. Not gonna enjoy that one bit.
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Well, tomorrow I'll leave Sweden. Maybe even for good. America is calling.
I'm pretty darn nervous, partly because of the entire move in general, but mostly for the flight. I'm terrified of flying, and flying from Stockholm to LA takes like 14 hours or something ridiculous like that. Not gonna enjoy that one bit.
I wish you luck then and I hope you fare well. Are you looking to move to the USA permanently or do you mean America in its entirity incling South, Middle and North America, trekking around?
If it's the second, we'll meet somewhere on the travelers path I am sure !Remember, remember, the 5th of November
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I wish you luck then and I hope you fare well. Are you looking to move to the USA permanently or do you mean America in its entirity incling South, Middle and North America, trekking around?
If it's the second, we'll meet somewhere on the travelers path I am sure !Ah, I should have specified, it's USA in particular. Leaving to stay with my boyfriend, and if everything goes well I won't have to return to Sweden in a year or so. That would suck.
That said, when I'm actually over there I would love the opportunity to travel around a bit, always wanted to see South America in some form.
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This post is deleted!
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I can't wait for this week (or just july in general tbh) to be over. It's been so busy that I've spent hardly any time at all working on my thesis. bleh. There's a big sale going on at work and my portfolio class is every day of the week in the middle of the afternoon, so it's been hard to find time to get stuff done since by 5pm, i'm ready to go home
i have managed to start going to bed/waking up early though, mostly due to setting a time up to my lamp and having it shine in my face every morning at 7am. This helps me get up early and go jogging, and earlier mornings mean i can plan my meals better and not be rushed, so I've managed to lose about 5lbs already in the past 2 weeks. gave up coke too, which wasn't too hard, but having a ready water supply (and bottled lemonade for lunches) really helped. hope to lose another 10lbs before i graduate at the end of August
gotta teach my first class soon too. i'm nervous as hell. i'm thinking about teaching how to make text and importing AI vector files into maya for 3d logos and decals. seems simple enough…
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I got fired from my job to 31. of august. Therefore I took sick leave now for the next 6weeks. PAID HOLIDAYS YAY!
Plans some days in Berlin, London and maybe even Amsterdam
And I plan on moving to Berlin in September or end of August. A big city is much better for my psyche. I haven't feeling happy lately.
"Unicorns can't see into your heart. All our dumb horns can do is glow, point towards the nearest rainbow and play rave music!"
Visit my Etsy Shop: Heart'n'Skull or Tumblr
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my day was fine. me and my sis theresa gone for a walk and got ice cream. SO YUMMY
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Donated blood today. Man at this point, it's a regular casual thing.
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does it hert to donate blood
NEVER GIVE UP.
STRAGHT EDGE MEANS I BETTER THAN U.
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A little, but it's not too bad.
Lucky bastard. I donated blood yesterday and it was some new guy, probably, because it felt as though the needle was still in my arm hours afterwards >=,X I've only donated blood 7 times and it has not always been fun experiences but that was just pissy.
Anyway, back on topic!
Today started at just past midnight. I'm getting ready for bed when my cat jumps in from the balcony with a mouse in her mouth. She drops it on the carpet in the livingroom intent on eating it then and there and I just barely manage to get up before there's blood everywhere. She hides behind the piano and wants to eat it there but as I try to get her outdoors (really, I don't want rodents in my apartement) she runs into my bedroom and we go around in circles around my apartement twice before she understands I wont leave her in peace before she goes outside. And I can't sleep before I scrub the floors in the places I know she's dumped the damn mouse because those things really are full of bacteria and stuff and it's kind of disgusting to think about. Urgh. Now I just want to deworm her but I did so less then two weeks ago and can't do it yet.
And then my sleep mask itches so I can't use it and therefore wake up bright and early (I don't have a problem with it in the morning so I can go back to sleep, fortunetly, but it's still annoying). Maybe I should just get an extra set of curtains or three. It's so strange, for most of my life I've lived in a place called Norrland and light has never been an issue (if it had been I'd be insane by now) but this year…? Urgh.
Later on I find some some... lovely... leftovers of guts and tails and bones on the balcony. With flies attached. Hurray.
And at work one of my colleages has to bring her sons and since I don't really have much to do in a practically empty museum (nothing is going on, practically everyone is on vacation etc) I turn into a babysitter. It's fun and they're mild mannered but I end up deciding I don't want kids. Ever. Really, children are so... demanding.
Ah. Evening, sweet evening. Why can't you be forever?
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Came back from the beach to a lot of work but my nephew is checking out of the hospital in a few days. That's good. Also, my sister and mom insisted i should tan a little since in their words "I'm white as fuck". I have my back sunburned T^T. Well, they said i tanned a little so…i guess it evens out? Maybe i look better tanned? Dunno.
Also, i'm worried about my brother. He's in a biology expedition in the Amazonas and i know he doesn't have any way to communicate with us but still i worry.
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First time posting here, it's always fun to see whats happening in other peoples days.. However in my day..
Or as a matter of fact all my days recently have been pretty nice. I have been doing cardistry for a month and it's amazing how much attention i get..
Was sitting on the bus today doing flourishes.. Just when i was about to get off the guy next to me said what i was doing was amazing.. Little surprised..
Attracts alot of people around me, unusual attention but it doesnt hurt..Well hopefully i wasnt boring..
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There is a downside to being reliable to your boss as he can call you to fill in a twelve hour shift despite having worked 50 hours already not counting today.
Thank god for overtime.
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Writing sad poems can really depress you. And this one is pivotal for the book i'm writing. I'm trying to take a little bit off the edge by watchin The Hunger Games II: Goddamit Peeta. I have like 25 of those so far.
Edit: How the fuck did Byron, Sor Juana, Whitman, Milton and others did it? Fuck.
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My father is feeling better, he said he will return on tuesday. I hope…
Oh, I got a letter from Epoida..It´s always nice to receive letters from people.
When AP used to be good:
NEVER FORGET !!
 
