So I failed to rewatch all the episodes (only got to Episode 10), but I'm gonna rank them anyway! This will probably change in like a week.
! 19. Little Dipper - I don't hate this episode, or really dislike it, but it's the one episode I just didn't feel at all. I'm not a big Gideon fan, and the concept wasn't really played around with to any real extent. The invisible wizard was great though.
! 18. Bottomless Pit! - This was a cool episode but there was a pretty good reason why these stories didn't get full episodes: they kinda sucked. Soos's was neat but nothing could really hold a whole episode. And for good reason.
! 17. Irrational Treasure - I'm gonna get a lot of flack for this one but it came right in between two fantastic episodes and I didn't really feel Trembley or Mabel's storyline. It was a fun episode, but it didn't really get to me like its closest relatives did. The legalization joke was great though.
! 16. The Hand That Rocks the Mabel - I'm not too fond of Gideon, so that didn't help this episode out. It did have some good jokes though.
! 15. Boyz Crazy - If there's anything that dragged on one too many episodes this season, it would have to be the Dipper-Wendy-Robbie love triangle. The manufactured pop artist stuff was fun and we could all use a lot more Candy and Grenda.
! 14. Dipper vs. Manliness - This episode was pretty weak, but it kinda solidified the parallels between myself and Dipper that really make me fond of the character. Also the montage was godly.
! 13. The Legend of the Gobblewonker - I liked how genre savvy this episode was. It didn't grab me like the pilot did though.
! 12. Summerween - There's not much special about this episode. I probably shoulda ranked it lower, to be honest, but it's not bad. I liked the concept behind the Trickster and the jokes were solid, but… yeah...
! 11. The Deep End - I don't remember much but the kid under the pool joke was horrifying enough to put it this high on my list.
! 10. Tourist Trapped - If a show doesn't hook you from Episode 1, how you gonna fall in love with it? this episode was stellar and made me a fan from the start. it perfectly defines the show's premise from the outset and asks a lot of questions. It's the perfect pilot episode.
! 9. Carpet Diem - This episode had two things going for it: killer Candy and Grenda jokes. And Waddles and Soos switching brains. The body switch is a well-worn trope, but this episode managed to hold its own by having great characters involved.
! 8. Headhunters - Wax Larry King. Wax Coolio. John Oliver as Wax Sherlock Holmes. Murder mystery. The pilot reeled me in. This was the episode that treated me to dinner afterwards.
! 7. Boss Mabel - I'm probably propping this episode up too much because of the extreme hiatus before it but I liked the monster and the jokes more than the surrounding episodes.
! 6. The Land Before Swine - This is a great Stan and Mabel episode filled with Waddles. What's not to love. I'm assuming there's a recency bias and I am likely to grade it down a bit later though. Still fantastic though.
! 5. Fight Fighters - As a 90s gamer, this episode speaks to my soul. It wasn't a fantastic episode narratively, but it's one of my all-time personal favorites.
! 4. Dreamscaperers - Recency bias might knock this episode down a peg later but it's probably the show's most hilarious/creepy episode yet. The summoning sequence was legitimately scary, something the show managed to capture once before…
! 3. Double Dipper - Why didn't Little Dipper land for me? Why was Carpet Diem barely saved by its characters? Because they were pretty standard tropes that were played fairly straight. Double Dipper has a standard trope: the body double. Then they trounce the usual end result of the trope (clones turning on each other?), dial the trope up to 11, bringing loving chaos with it, then they play the trope straight anyway. It's a good example of how to make good comedy out of hyperbole.
! 2. The Time Traveler's Pig - This was so hard not to put as my #1. I had it there for a while too. It's a fantastic episode that once again takes a well-worn trope, dials it to eleven while tying together a ton of continuity, and manages to fill the episode with pulses of heart. It's powerful and evocative that Dipper can only get what he wants if it means Mabel losing what she wants. Sure, it would've been nice if the love triangle DID run its course here, but would I sacrifice Waddles for that? Hell no!
! 1. The Inconveniencing - THIS is my favorite episode of the show, hands down. THIS is the episode that I use to reel in new fans. This episode has not failed me yet. It's funny, it's got a nice core story, but most of all, it's actually pretty damn scary. This episode toys around with the slasher flick genre and picks off the teens one by one while still being funny as hell with it. Then the ghost shows up, Lee becomes a hot dog, the synthesized late-80s horror music ramps up and the place literally turns upside down. The instant that happens, chills run down my spine. It's such a perfect sequence that sounds utterly ridiculous, but it's a nice blend of things that makes it really pop! The whole episode is a treat. Yeah, it gave us the love triangle, but it manages to effectively use Wendy like no other episode has and it features The Duchess Approves. This is Gravity Falls at its absolute finest. :)