Once upon a time in the mystical land of Singapore, there existed a dolphin. This dolphin was a huge Hugh Laurie fan and had been locked away in a cage by the evil Russian mobster Sakonosolo, better known as The Stalker. The Stalker wanted power and the taste of durians, but this 'trappedolphin' could not allow him to put his hands on them. Therefore, she used her magical hax powers to transport the magical six durians as far away from Singapore as possible.
One landed in the arid New Mexican desert, where a mischeivous boy consumed it. One landed in Finland, where two Finnish boys fought over it, with one ultimately winning. One found its way to OhioMichigan (:ninja:), where a crossdressing dude with cool hair found it. One landed in Louisiana, where a chef put it on a po'boy. One landed in Germany, where a red-headed woman ate it, and the last in Joja, where a lemonhead beat it in a foul-taste contest.
What these six did not know was that these durians granted them superpowers. The fox, Kitsune, was granted the power to control fire and turn people into furries. His alter-ego was Death by Foxy. Dryish, the Finnish victor, gained wings of rainbow and the gift of flight, known as Ultra Parrot. Jay from Ohio gained the ability to change his gender and the gender of others, earning the nickname Rose Garden. The puppet cook Kenny gained the ability to control his opponents' movements and cook kickass Cajun food, calling himself the Iron Ventriloquist. Nami in Germany gained the ability to control water, no matter its state. Because there are no oceans in Germany (yes there are, but shut up), she took control of her namesake, Avalanche. Finally, the lemon, Gypsy, earned the ability to be drop-dead gorgeous, earning the superhero name, Narcissista G.
Death by Foxy… Ultra Parrot... Rose Garden... Iron Ventriloquist... Avalanche... Narcissista G... Together, they are an emblem of justice. They are D.U.R.I.A.N.. Their goal is to save trapped from the Stalker. But first... they have to get off their asses and do something. And the author needs to actually write this stuff.
Meanwhile, in an evil lair...
"So it would seem I wasn't invited to be a superhero," the cold voice spat. "If I can't be a member of D.U.R.I.A.N., I'll have to DESTROY them. Bwahahahahahaha!"
The villain shifted his cloak, revealing his face to be that of a cat. "I... Hans von Chesca, hereby assume the name... Cuddles the Dark, Avatar of Fear, Twilight of Despair, Dragonball: Evolution of Misery! Bwahahahahahahahahaha! Though, Cuddles the Dark is long enough... yes..."
TO BE CONTINUED.
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Slytherin all the way, baby~
