Man, that sucks Shinpanman.
Cults really are a drain on the 'soul' of the people they claim to save.
Confession Session - LOCK THIS THREAD
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There's almost nobody I can talk to about this but I think I lost someone I love very much to a cult.
! Anyone here heard of the World Mission Society Church of God? Well they're this South Korean religious group that believes the second coming of Christ already occurred in the form of a South Korean man known as Ahnsahnghong who "revealed" the bible and died in 1985, corpse, grave, and everything. After his death his "spiritual wife" took control of the church and she is believed to be the female incarnation of god. They predict the end of the world in the near, near future and that only the members of their church will be saved.
! Anyway, the way I got involved with all this was when my boyfriend's brother started visiting him at our school. From what my boyfriend told me this was kind of rare even though he didn't work very far away and he had noticed some serious changes in his brother. He had cleaned up his appearance and no longer drank etc… This seemed perfectly fine to me, and I didn't think anything of it until after Thanksgiving break my boyfriend started jokingly (everything's a joke with him) berating me for being an atheist. Now, I'm not actually an atheist, I'm simply a non religious person who doesn't believe these things can be proven one way or another (agnostic if we need a category).
! This was the first time I had felt a rift between us due to "religious" differences and I started to question him about it. He explained that his brother had introduced him to a new church that answered all the questions he had always had about the bible and proved the teachings of most other churches wrong. The whole thing just seemed silly to me because I had my reasons not to trust the bible or any church in general, but I chose to respect his beliefs and we had many discussions about it that weren't exactly arguments.
! After I returned from spending part of winter break with my family he began earnestly trying to convert me and things really went downhill from there. He essentially tricked me into attending his church and a study session on bible prophecy which was extremely uncomfortable for me as well as unconvincing. He even enlisted his brother to speak to me which is when I started to learn about their belief in the end of the world and getting really concerned. I started researching their group and seeing that a lot of families and friends were being torn apart by their aggressive recruiting methods and end of the world mentality.
! I could see by the start of the next semester that my boyfriend's life was beginning to fall to pieces. He barely registered for courses on time, barely showed up for classes and had to borrow from our employer to pay rent. He told me that this was because his physical life no longer held meaning and that the only reason he even came to school was so that people wouldn't think badly of his church. He was obsessed with the idea of being one of God's chosen people and getting as high up in the heavenly hierarchy as possible, and whenever I tried to warn him against being too sure of any one thing he just called me stupid and narrow minded.
! After about two months of denial over the whole thing, I decided that I couldn't help him anymore and that I had to end it. So two weeks ago I broke up with him which of course didn't really matter since our relationship was already destroyed. Unfortunately this does almost nothing to ease my pain since I still have to watch him struggle in school and deal with the void in my life that he occupied.
! I guess this is the part that's actually a confession about myself. I thought I could be stronger but really I'm completely weak. A week after I ended it, I was already calling again saying that I still loved him and wanted to work things out somehow but he just said it was pointless and temporary and that he wasn't right for me anyway, which just resulted in me feeling more crushed. Our lives were so heavily intertwined that I'm finding it hard to just be myself anymore and the only thing that keeps me going is the hope that when the world doesn't end within the year as they predict, he'll understand that he was wrong and we'll be able to speak again. It's pathetic but I don't know how to cope otherwise. There are so many things I wish I could've done differently and this is probably the first time I've ever wished anyone, the "God mother", would just keel over and die.
! Everything in my rational mind tells me I'm being an idiot and that he was an idiot but I just can't change the way I feel. I just needed to put this out somewhere to admit to myself that it's real.This is just my opinion so take it for what it is worth to ya:
It’s probably better off this way. Not to bash religious people at all but generally they have an issue when someone is agnostic/atheist. It eventually rears its ugly head during weird circumstances and when it does it isn’t pretty. Even if this hadn’t happened and he was totally cool with you not joining his cult-esk religion… would you really want to be with someone who was drawn in so easily by something like this? I mean from what you are saying it seems like his entire personality is changing, and that’s really bad. Seriously think about it, if he can be swayed by this, what else can he be swayed by? Is that really a quality you want in someone? I was almost married once and it took awhile to realize that I wouldn’t want to be with her if what she had changed into was what I was going to be with for the rest of my life. >.> My case is a bit different but the principle is still the same, would you really want to deal with this again if it happened?
Hopefully that helps a little? I don’t mean to jump in your business but I’ve had some of the worst experiences in relationships :P if you ever want to hear about some of em just PM me, maybe it will make you feel better to hear someone else’s bad luck :D
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My stupidity has been bothering me for a few days now…
edit:
Don't wanna needlessly alarm any friends with what I wrote... <_< -
@piratemarimo: I remember when I told my family how afraid of death I was, they just sat there and told me, "Man, a meteor can fall out of the sky and kill us all right now. Don't live in fear." And you know what, it was really simple shit but I thought about it and I figured, they're right.
Everyone around you is heading towards the same end, death is inevitable. So then rather than thinking about the inevitable, you should instead think about the things you CAN influence, that you CAN control. If you don't want your death to be worthless then start working today on giving it some worth. I mean just think of how silly that sounds. You could be thinking about something that matters but instead you're going, "Oh… Oh... Hope I don't die." You're GOING to, anyway. >_>
Only difference is that you're wasting all your time fearing it.
Edit: Though on the "envisioning the muders of others" thing, don't quite have advice for that one. I'd say it's a side effect of thinking about death all the time and not that you're actually fucked up or anything. You DO need to stop obsessing over it, though.
And shit, if you feel like you need help then get some help. Talking is a good start but if you need therapy then you should seek some. It's quite possible that there's an underlying reason for this, most likely due in part to a lack of self-esteem or self-confidence and it would be a good idea for you to come to terms with these issues.
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There's almost nobody I can talk to about this but I think I lost someone I love very much to a cult.
! Anyone here heard of the World Mission Society Church of God? Well they're this South Korean religious group that believes the second coming of Christ already occurred in the form of a South Korean man known as Ahnsahnghong who "revealed" the bible and died in 1985, corpse, grave, and everything. After his death his "spiritual wife" took control of the church and she is believed to be the female incarnation of god. They predict the end of the world in the near, near future and that only the members of their church will be saved.
! Anyway, the way I got involved with all this was when my boyfriend's brother started visiting him at our school. From what my boyfriend told me this was kind of rare even though he didn't work very far away and he had noticed some serious changes in his brother. He had cleaned up his appearance and no longer drank etc… This seemed perfectly fine to me, and I didn't think anything of it until after Thanksgiving break my boyfriend started jokingly (everything's a joke with him) berating me for being an atheist. Now, I'm not actually an atheist, I'm simply a non religious person who doesn't believe these things can be proven one way or another (agnostic if we need a category).
! This was the first time I had felt a rift between us due to "religious" differences and I started to question him about it. He explained that his brother had introduced him to a new church that answered all the questions he had always had about the bible and proved the teachings of most other churches wrong. The whole thing just seemed silly to me because I had my reasons not to trust the bible or any church in general, but I chose to respect his beliefs and we had many discussions about it that weren't exactly arguments.
! After I returned from spending part of winter break with my family he began earnestly trying to convert me and things really went downhill from there. He essentially tricked me into attending his church and a study session on bible prophecy which was extremely uncomfortable for me as well as unconvincing. He even enlisted his brother to speak to me which is when I started to learn about their belief in the end of the world and getting really concerned. I started researching their group and seeing that a lot of families and friends were being torn apart by their aggressive recruiting methods and end of the world mentality.
! I could see by the start of the next semester that my boyfriend's life was beginning to fall to pieces. He barely registered for courses on time, barely showed up for classes and had to borrow from our employer to pay rent. He told me that this was because his physical life no longer held meaning and that the only reason he even came to school was so that people wouldn't think badly of his church. He was obsessed with the idea of being one of God's chosen people and getting as high up in the heavenly hierarchy as possible, and whenever I tried to warn him against being too sure of any one thing he just called me stupid and narrow minded.
! After about two months of denial over the whole thing, I decided that I couldn't help him anymore and that I had to end it. So two weeks ago I broke up with him which of course didn't really matter since our relationship was already destroyed. Unfortunately this does almost nothing to ease my pain since I still have to watch him struggle in school and deal with the void in my life that he occupied.
! I guess this is the part that's actually a confession about myself. I thought I could be stronger but really I'm completely weak. A week after I ended it, I was already calling again saying that I still loved him and wanted to work things out somehow but he just said it was pointless and temporary and that he wasn't right for me anyway, which just resulted in me feeling more crushed. Our lives were so heavily intertwined that I'm finding it hard to just be myself anymore and the only thing that keeps me going is the hope that when the world doesn't end within the year as they predict, he'll understand that he was wrong and we'll be able to speak again. It's pathetic but I don't know how to cope otherwise. There are so many things I wish I could've done differently and this is probably the first time I've ever wished anyone, the "God mother", would just keel over and die.
! Everything in my rational mind tells me I'm being an idiot and that he was an idiot but I just can't change the way I feel. I just needed to put this out somewhere to admit to myself that it's real.You really are the only one that can decide whether or not to leave him. However, if you don't want to lose him, here's my suggestion:
As for waiting for the year, it might not do any good. Cults tend to get around problems like "world didn't end in time".
If you really want your boyfriend out of the cult, I suggest getting professional help for him (although it may already be to late). Either a cult expert or an actual priest (Might sound silly to you, but this is what they do for living, guiding the misguided).What ever you decide to do, I wish you strength, courage and perseverance to carry it out.
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@geekialrage and Spatial Piano: Thanks, you guys make very valid points. The fact is that whether the world ends or not, he's the same person, and an impressionable one at that, so there's nothing to say that he won't just fall victim to some other belief system or the same one when they inevitably twist their doctrine to match a new end date. It would probably be a mistake to ever subject myself to this again but as you know this involves some very irrational, irrational feelings.
Our mutual friend talked to me about possibly contacting his parents and staging some sort of intervention at one point, but I really think it's too late for that. My real hope is that he'll learn this on his own. Hurts like hell though to think that things will never be the same.
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@pirate: hey dear, before I try and give a little advice, it would help to know how old you are (and like, do you go to school every day with people 5 days a week, are you in college, are you out of school taking time off before going back or are you out of college/high school and employed/unemployed?) trying to get a better picture of your age and also WHERE these thoughts are occurring most.
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@geekialrage and Spatial Piano: Thanks, you guys make very valid points. The fact is that whether the world ends or not, he's the same person, and an impressionable one at that, so there's nothing to say that he won't just fall victim to some other belief system or the same one when they inevitably twist their doctrine to match a new end date. It would probably be a mistake to ever subject myself to this again but as you know this involves some very irrational, irrational feelings.
Our mutual friend talked to me about possibly contacting his parents and staging some sort of intervention at one point, but I really think it's too late for that. My real hope is that he'll learn this on his own. Hurts like hell though to think that things will never be the same.
Exactly :) but I totally understand the irrational feelings. I've done things I would never do because of said irrational feelings.
Key point is the bold, they really won't… no matter how hard you try there will always be that feeling there. Takes a lot longer than normally expected to get over all that "crap" though.
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This shit has been bothering me:
[hide]I've always had the urge to fuck shit up. Ever since sixth grade at the latest.
Kick a car while crossing the street, punch someone congratulating me, telling someone whose only crime is being overly friendly to 'Fuck off.'
It feels like it's been getting somewhat worse. Tonight, I visited my friend and had a good time, but there were points in the evening where I would imagine myself smashing his stuff or throwing plates at the wall and upsetting him, and I don't know why I keep having these urges to do this. Not drives, just like my brain is making 'suggestions' rather than giving orders for me to do it.
I haven't done anything stupid, but god damn does it get old.
Also, I can't string coherent thoughts or sentences together sometimes, and I'll stop mid sentence because my brain and mouth have shut down, leaving me stranded just wondering what the hell I was even doing, much less what I was talking about.
Also, at work I'm just spacing out to the point where I wonder if there really is something wrong with my brain. I'm not just talking daydreaming, I'm talking being on Mars for minutes at a time.[/hide] -
@Cuddles:
stuff and thang
Hoo, boy… I got this one. I know exactly what's going on right here, you're frustrated and you're unsatisified with your current shit. Whatever you got going on in life right now ain't cutting it for you and that's manifesting itself as anger. I know this because I used to feel the same way and think, "Man, why the fuck are you so happy? Life sucks. If I make this happy motherfucker miserable is he really just going to bounce back like that or is his ass just miserable and putting on a front to taunt me into thinking you can truly be happy?"
The thing that ended those thoughts for me was getting into a relationship but that shit didn't end well and now I'm an empty husk so I wouldn't necessarily advise that one. Instead, what I did take from it was that you have to find something you can invest yourself into 100% and just be happy with. And like, I know I've told you a hundred times before but this requires exploration and diving into shit that you've never tried before in pursuit of that one thing that's going to make your ass happy. I can't even really tell you what that thing is going to be, only you know what it is.
But for now, as long as you realize you're just frustrated you can start to curve those emotions and calm down a little. It helps to know why you're feeling the shit you feel.
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Nonsense, that sounds like something he needs therapy for. Namely that it feels like suggestions rather then just plain anger.
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I was going to say frustration in place of anger but that would just be repetitive. Should have just said that anyway. But, hmm… Regardless of whether or not he needs therapy, I'd still pin the root of it all as a lack of satisfaction. I've talked to Cuddles a lot and I feel like he expresses his issues pretty well as it is (at least lately, anyway) so for these urges to get worse instead of recede, I'd pin that on the frustration brought on by a lack of fullfillment and/or being unable to settle into, for the most part, a stable lifestyle based on past experiences. It's like a combo of anxiousness mixed in with understimulation, a great deal of understimulation.
But shit, I'm not a doctor. All of the crap I infer is based on observation and I have no true professional training, so therapy probably would be a good idea. And just for the record Cuddles, in case you're taking the shit I'm saying to heart, I could be entirely wrong. You should determine for yourself just how badly this shit is affecting your life and approach accordingly.
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Guys, I dunno what you would do if you got to walk a mile in my shoes, honestly :P
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My mom, with a knife in her hand, rolled around on the floor with my stepfather as they tried to kill one another. My baby sister was laying down in the other room and I was 12.
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@No:
Guys, I dunno what you would do if you got to walk a mile in my shoes, honestly :P
I'd get the hell out of the Czech Republic.
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@No:
Guys, I dunno what you would do if you got to walk a mile in my shoes, honestly :P
What the hell is this supposed to mean.
You wanna hear the most traumatizing shit people have been through in comparison to yours or something?
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@No:
Guys, I dunno what you would do if you got to walk a mile in my shoes, honestly :P
I dunno what you would do if you got to take a step in my shoes, honestly :P
jkjk. Different people face same/similar situations in different ways. Let's leave it at that~ ;)
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Yeah, you can't really compare different situations of different people. Everyone grew up differently and has a their own psyche. What you can do is trying to be empathetic and offer help or advise.
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@Kenny: Yeah, Jerk Disease is right in this case in that it's not an issue of anger. You know that poem I made with Invidia, Ira and Acedia? That's anger.
But still, I don't think you're too far off the mark (I have been incredibly frustrated with a lot of things lately: not knowing how to socialize, not knowing where to go to meet people like myself, not knowing how to talk to a girl, etc.), not to mention that the one girl I thought I had a chance with only wanted to use me for money and that I hate living where I live. Top it all off with the fact that I'm only doing this because there's really only death and loneliness for me if I don't keep trying to interact with other people and I'm just really…not depressed but not exactly happy either.
But I will talk more to my therapist about this subject, that's for sure. -
I meant frustration.
throws glass on floor
Tired of this shit. >=0
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@Cuddles:
@Kenny: Yeah, Jerk Disease is right in this case in that it's not an issue of anger. You know that poem I made with Invidia, Ira and Acedia? That's anger.
But still, I don't think you're too far off the mark (I have been incredibly frustrated with a lot of things lately: not knowing how to socialize, not knowing where to go to meet people like myself, not knowing how to talk to a girl, etc.), not to mention that the one girl I thought I had a chance with only wanted to use me for money and that I hate living where I live. Top it all off with the fact that I'm only doing this because there's really only death and loneliness for me if I don't keep trying to interact with other people and I'm just really…not depressed but not exactly happy either.
But I will talk more to my therapist about this subject, that's for sure.Maybe you have social anxiety disorder.
I mean, if you don't have any autism spectrum thing, which would otherwise explain socialization issues. -
@Uncle:
I meant frustration.
throws glass on floor
Tired of this shit. >=0
I'm sowwy :cwy:
@JERK:Maybe you have social anxiety disorder.
I mean, if you don't have any autism spectrum thing, which would otherwise explain socialization issues.Well, I already have Asperger's, depression and have been diagnosed as 'emotionally disturbed' when I was a kid, so what's one more.
This would be a topic of interest for my therapist, though, so I can try exploring that. -
Well see I dunno then. If you have aspergers that would explain social difficuilty.
Social Anxiety Disorder is intense irrational fear of judgement. Which can impair social performance.
I was suggesting it if there was no other explanation for severe social issues.
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You know Chesca… you don't come off being remotely socially awkward or whatnot.
I haven't seen you irl so I can't say for sure, but I think you doubt yourself too much dude.
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Well of course, that's the hell of self-doubt, when you know damn well you're a charming upstanding suave bro…..and yet your head is full of a hurricane of irrational anxiety.
You might as well be ...Buuhan.
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You know Chesca… you don't come off being remotely socially awkward or whatnot.
I haven't seen you irl so I can't say for sure, but I think you doubt yourself too much dude.
Listen to Jesus.
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What the hell is this supposed to mean.
You wanna hear the most traumatizing shit people have been through in comparison to yours or something?
You weren't around when I mentioned my mother, were you ? :ninja:
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@No:
Guys, I dunno what you would do if you got to walk a mile in my shoes, honestly :P
@No:
You weren't around when I mentioned my mother, were you ? :ninja:
You don't know a good deal of posters here to be posting this.
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@No:
You weren't around when I mentioned my mother, were you ? :ninja:
Don't do this shit.
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Well while I wasn't all too serious , but let's just say she's…...realy a handfull.
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The Pick Apart Squad Leader: No Maam
Members: Outerspec, Thousand-Lion-San , Big Bad Lith -
I dunno what you would do if you got to take a step in my shoes, honestly :P
jkjk. Different people face same/similar situations in different ways. Let's leave it at that~ ;)
Yeah, was kind of a dumb thing to post.
I just realy dunno what to do. I tried leaving her out but she always found her way back :ninja:
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@No:
Guys, I dunno what you would do if you got to walk a mile in my shoes, honestly :P
@No:
You weren't around when I mentioned my mother, were you ? :ninja:
You do know that if you want people to recognize or respect your for your oh-so-horrible past, oh-so-horrible present, oh-so-horrible mother you're doing it the wrong way, right?
@No:
Yeah, was kind of a dumb thing to post.
I just realy dunno what to do. I tried leaving her out but she always found her way back :ninja:
Then you haven't tried hard enough.
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What would you advise to do about that then ?
Thing is, the neighbours have complained about the constant yelling, and well, I don't want to get thrown out cause of it.
Mind you, I'm the one paying for all services around here. But stil, I can't bring myself to throw her out myself.
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No Maam successfully turns this into something about him
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I am noticing that I'm socializing more and more lately and I am more confident in myself.
I took 11 years, but finally I see myself as someone cool and nice.
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Uncle Kenny, you really are an insightful person, you know that? Seems like for any given situation, you've got good advice to give.
Maybe my problem is that I'm constantly stressed out about school and get really negative and just plain angry at nothing. You noticed that unfortunate shortcoming in me, and I feel disappointed in myself that I really haven't improved my temper or learned how to be a better person. Someone's told me that I have changed, but I just don't see it.
I worry nonstop and kind of just lie around feeling sorry for myself. If I learn how to be more positive, I feel like maybe I wouldn't be bothered by any freakish thoughts. But how exactly does one go about a complete reversal of outlook on life like that? I have zero confidence, even though I always feel extremely happy when others compliment me, even if it's only for things like silly little doodles. It's just not enough to keep me going 24/7.
Or maybe I just don't have enough that engages me? My English class is the only thing that really does that for me right now. It's the only time of the school day in which I am focused and cheerful. Not that I should do pointless things for the sake of making myself busy, but I think being active in some way (besides doing homework) is a key to avoid brooding on dark thoughts but instead enjoying life like I ought to.
Problem is, English class is the very thing which makes me feel like I'm running in a vicious cycle because of the amount of homework that we get. I've been neglecting my two econ classes and have a lot of assignments to catch up on. I just don't feel motivation for school like I used to but I wish I could because it'd probably make life easier; I'd get more sleep and not be staying up until 5 a.m. trying to desperately finish a project the day it's due because I was lazy and didn't give a fuck until last minute. It makes me feel like I've got no freedom and that the only times I relax are when I irresponsibly choose to forfeit time I should be using to study and bring up my mostly abysmal grades.
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this and that
WARNING: Long as the fuck.
! You beat yourself up too much. If you think you're terrible for not being able to control your anger, you really shouldn't feel that way. For years I've had to deal with anger issues and uncontrollable temper and it was only until recently that I've calmed down a lot. I feel like, things don't really get to me the way they used to anymore. I stop myself from saying or doing things while angy when I tell myself in my head, "Calm down. You're just thinking irrationally right now," or, "It's not worth it."
! And you know, I truly feel that way. Because always when I used to deal with my anger, shortly afterwards whether it was later that day or later that week or whatever, I'd feel bad or terrible about it. I just feel like, I could better spend that time being sad or frustrated from the needless drama I cause with my anger, by just taking action in that first instance, and I don't want to lose or upset those people close to me. Like even today, a friend of mine joked around with me on AIM and I got upset at her but I just admitted to her that I was upset and it wasn't her fault, that I was just frustrated and I was the one being out of line. And she understood that and respected it.
! As long as you at least try to maintain a level of respect, I'm sure people will understand where you're coming from. We all put up with all kinds of bullshit, we know life isn't all sunshine and rainbows. I feel like, the second you're able to admit when you're wrong on a regular basis, is the second you grow as a person. Every time you release that anger, it's only temporary relief at best. It was only when I learned that I valued my friendships and felt so much better interacting with people that I realized, "Man… This anger thing is only making things worse for me."
! And for the motivation thing or just self-esteem or confidence in general, you really just gotta convict yourself to something or even multiple things. You're right in that being active is a good way to get rid of all those negative emotions but the key point is to be active in things you enjoy. It's not going to do you any good to try and pile up your plate with shit you're not absolutely sure is going to make you happy. And I had trouble in school too, still do. The only way I can think to get around procrastination is to just make school work for you and not the other way around.
! In high school, I turned school into a game and ended up making straight A's for a semester that way. The only reason I even had for doing it was, "I just want to see if I can make straight A's." It gave me a goal to work for, ya know? A reason to even bother with all that dumb shit. And the education system is pure shit (though that's a whole other story). If you want to do well in school, you have to treat it like any other goal and do it for you. If you want to prevent yourself from slacking off then go to the library for your work or stay on school grounds or whatever. Being stuck in a professional setting will give you an incentive to do your work and not slack off.
! You really gotta want to accomplish something or learn something or whatever when you go to school. Most of the shit they teach you is seemingly pointless but if you can't concentrate on it, think of it from a different perspective. What are you interested in? How can the shit I'm learning apply to whatever it is I'm interested in? And you can almost tie everything to everything (yes, math included; I'm actually highly interested in math now because everything can be expressed in terms of it, you should look that up). Just make school work for you. Remember, this is ultimately your life. The shit you do on a day to day basis is for you.
! What do you want to be? How do you want to get there? What makes you happy? Etc. You should always keep your mind on your goals and bettering yourself. And talk to your friends, hang out with them, do what you gotta do to take your mind off of shit and just chill back and relax. Get stuff off your chest as well and talk to people. If you don't want to do that or it can't help, write about stuff and get your frustration out like that. Hell, typing is pretty much writing, that's probably why it's easier to say shit on here (that and no physical contact). And ultimately, if you need therapy then try to seek some. Honestly, I used to hate it before and talk all kinds of shit about it but… it's good to get it out and hear from a professional this and this and whatever.
! They might not be able to fully help you but they can at least point you in the right direction and maybe offer you a perspective you hadn't looked at before. And that might be good for you. And if you can't do it then just know, talking is always a good method to get shit out and feel better. It's a refreshing feeling when you know you don't have to shoulder everything by yourself. And you should never feel like you have to. -
Kenny–bravo. Really, there's nothing else to say. Excellent post.
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@I:
Kenny–bravo. Really, there's nothing else to say. Excellent post.
this
i wanted to say somethign aswell , but kenny said all
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My Ken-Ken boy is such a mature, intelligent, lil' brat~
Listen to him Marimo. He gave you some good, solid advice there. -
I was always more attracted to older women/girls.
I had crushes on girls my age and still find some good looking or cute but I was never really sexually attracted to them. It began when I was like 10. I prefered 13-14 year olds then, at around 14 I prefered 17-18 year olds and now (18) I prefer women in their twenties. There's nothing more attractive (and challenging) than a woman that is older and has another "level of maturity" (couldn't think of a better expression) than me.Well, I guess that's way better than the opposite.
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This post is deleted!
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Well ..
This is making me a little uneasy, and I do not know who to talk to, so I decided to ask for help from strangers (desperate).It's been 5 years that my father left my family and moved in with another, the process was not easy for me but today I'm happy (more than before).
The problem is that my father is buying expensive things for me without a reason.
I never asked for anything, and yet he buys things that I don´t want / don´t have interece.
My mom says that's remorse (he wants to reward me for the shit he did with my life), I'm over all this, sincerely, I just don´t want him to spend lots of money trying to buy my forgiveness (something he already has).
I've tried talking to him and He says that it is not remorse, but I can not stop thinking it is.
What can I do ?
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Why is our lord and saviour banned?
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I guess because he may have been….a dupe of Smudger ?
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Cap Ugly–the simple truth is you can't control other people's behavior.
You can try again to say that he doesn't need to do what he's doing, or that when he does it makes you feel " feelings here " and maybe even say what you'd prefer (more time together, or something, if that is the case) if there is something, but in the end, he is the only one who can decide to stop.
You can only let it go and continue to send the message of acceptance and forgiveness through your actions and words. The rest is up to time and his own process of healing.
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@I:
and maybe even say what you'd prefer (more time together, or something, if that is the case)
WOW !
You nailed it.
Well… Thanks for the tip.
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I have an idea for a short story. But I fear somebody already had that idea, so I didn't start to write it. Meh…
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Write it, dammit.