What is this Gary Oak gag anyway? All I've seen is a poor excuse for RP to give me some kind of clue, and it's not helping.
WHO IS GARY OAK!?!?!?
Well, let me lay it down on you, Terek.
He shows up to challenge you when you have just done something great and are worn down.
You have just been rewarded with your Masters Degree in Cancer Research. In ten minutes you are going to have an interview to get the job of a lifetime with a six digit salary. You'll be able to pay off your student loans no problem. You flip on the TV right before you leave and what do you see? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK has just found the cure for cancer.
You're training on Route 22 for Brock's Gym, your Pokémon are tired, and who do you see? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.
You just beat Lance, the last one of the Elite Four, with all of your revives and healing items used up and being almost raped by his onslaught of shitting dick nipples. In the middle of jamming the A-button, he says you WOULD be the champion, but who has to be in the next room that's so bare it's epic? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.
It's 1997 and you're downloading Pokémon porn on your 56k modem. Oh boy, this zip file full of Misty nudes only has 10 minutes left. You've been waiting six hours for this. When the file gets to 99.9%, you start unzipping your pants and are getting ready for the fap of your life. At that moment, guess who picks up the phone and disconnects you? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.
You have just fended off a shark, you are bloody and tired but you can climb onto the boat when who shows up to stomp your fingers? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.
You and your girlfriend (both virgins) are ready to have sex for the first time. At the moment you get nude and horny and ready to bang your bitch, GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK already took away her virginity. Good luck getting another virgin from CraigList.
Congratulations, You have finally beaten Gary Oak and have no healing items left over. You head over to the Pokemon center and then the PokeMart, guess who blocks the entrance to the Pokemart. GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK That's Right, Gary Oak is just that Epic
You're walking home at night and a nigger attacks you with a knife. You are able to drive him off using years of karate lessons, still sustaining some deep knife wounds. Guess who shows up and asks you for your wallet with a baseball bat? Gary MOTHERFUCKING OAK, that's who.
Gary Oak just finished owning your ass with kung-fu. He's walking to the hospital to recover from the wounds he got. He's tired. He crashes into a mirror, and ends up in a coma. Why? Because not even GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK is safe from GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.
And if you don't fucking get that, here's a video.