Overcome the impossible!

Malintex_Terek

I got an email earlier today from an admissions officer for a professional program I'm applying for, saying that she's upped the requirements for the program and all applicants who do not already meet the new standards must reach them by June 2010. It's just the latest roadblock in my quest for a career, and given the new requirements what she's asking me to accomplish is impossible for most students, but I've done insane/outrageous things over the past few years so I'm fairly confident I can succeed.

In this topic, I'd like people to give their personal stories about how they were given an impossible scenario and managed to find a way to overcome it, work around it, or defuse the problem. The story can be anything, from you applying to a program like me, talking down a convenience store gunman, or avoid narrowly getting killed by a car by jumping from the seat of your bike over a truck.

I look forward to tales of incredible awesome and badarsery.

Ubiq

The Blazer I was in was hit by a train, did a barrel roll, and landed upside down. I responded by not dying.

Gekko135

The Grand Prix I was in was t-boned on the passenger's side by a truck going 60mph. I responded by looking away as a shower of glass peppered the side of my head. Other than a lot of cuts on my face (which healed in like a week), I had no injuries.

not as cool as Ubiq's, but the glass missed my left eye by mere millimeters.

I'm also quite glad that I had JUST dropped off a buddy of mine before it happened as the passenger's side was caved into the center armrest

0_0_Spider

1-still alive after having my wrist sliced open vertically…who wants 2 see it?

2-glasses got smashed into pieces in a basketball game...left me with a 5 stitches scar a few mm away from my eye...but nothing happened to my eye...who wants to see it?

3-crashed my dad's car on the highway during a snow storm...but only got a bruised knee.

yes i got the devil's luck

Mister_Anbu

I keep reading Naruto every week.

Mokenda_mint

@Mister_Anbu:

I keep reading Naruto every week.

Nerves of steel!

Uuuuh… back in 2004 I got really sick after a trip to the state fair. Every day I felt completely drained of energy. Every time I went to bed I felt like I was suffocating. I didn't eat well and survived on ginger ale, water, and meager meals for 6 months. Went to doctor after doctor each telling me bullshit "Viral", "Flu", "It's all in your head"
Finally someone suggested a chiropractor/accupuncture specialist. Turns out my back was horribly out of whack and pressing on my respiratory nerves. The chiropractor popped my back in place (it was like grandfinale fireworks!) and did some accupuncture for my immune system. When I left the building I was already hacking up giant loogies which had been stuck in my chest for months.
After 6 months of people telling me I didn't know what I was talking about I finally got better. Fuck you mainstream medicine.

...yeah that's all I got

Palochka

I was almost kicked out of my university for a bad quarter but then I wooed the dean into letting me stay.

Malintex_Terek

@Palochka:

I was almost kicked out of my university for a bad quarter but then I wooed the dean into letting me stay.

You attended UCLA?

S7evin

Health:
Got food poisoning, that wouldn't go away. I was basically lying in my bed for a month and a half, unable to eat or drink anything. When I got better and got out of bed, I had lost any weight and muscle I had before that; I looked like a skeleton. When I later went to the doctor, he told me I should have went to a hospital after the first week and that I could have very well died.

Got blood poisoning. I had a small wound on my wrist that somehow got infected. Didn't do anything. Two days later I had black veins running up my arm towards my heart. Got raced to the hospital where I had to stay for almost a week. That could have killed me as well.

Various accidents involving me falling down/being pushed/etc. that has resulted in multiple scars on my face, about 15 all in all in varying sizes.

Accomplishments:
I moved to a different country twice without knowing the language or anybody there, both times I learned the language and formed some lasting friendships.

I was the best in my year at my school, but that was more luck than anything else.

I also got mugged once, but I fought back. I ended with two scars and the attacker pretty much shredded my jacket with his knife but I think I broke the guy's nose. They never did catch him, but I retained my cash and felt pretty badass for a week after that.

IrishLuigi

Back in 2003 or 2002, I was 10 or 9, On our school photography day, I was walking to school on a cold winter's day and was crossing a zebra crossing, I just got past the bus when a motorbike came along it and hit my right leg. I did a barrel roll and landed on my face. I went to school nevertheless.

I still have the school photograph where I'm looking to the right at an awkward angle to cover the massive bruise/scab/othernastythings on my face.

Yonkou3

I got a job as a Signal Maintainer(Which requires quite a bit of electrical knowledge) for NYCT, making $18 an hour at 17 years old without knowing a god damn thing about electricty.

brennen.exe

When I was 17, I was skateboarding home from the park, and while I was crossing a street I was hit by a car that ran a red light. They started slamming on the breaks when they saw me, so I am sure what could have been much worse was avoided, but my skateboard was lodged under their car and I was sent flying over their hood to land in the middle of the street about five or so feet away from the car. I responded by getting up, dusting my clothes off, grabbing my skateboard, and skating the rest of the two miles home laughing. I overcame the force of the car with 17 years of milk addiction.

Kaze

In the small city I live in we have a local park area with a crappy fenced in skate park. It was sunday afternoon and the city, the one who runs the skate park, had it closed on Sundays, but that didn't stop me and a bunch of other skaters from climbing the fence and having a good time.
Butsadly, our time of fun was cut short when we got word that someone had called the cops on us, most everyone there didn't believe it and stayed there and skated, while a few of us ((including me)) climbed out of the park and started to skate home. As my friend and I began to skate away from the park we turned this corner that was covered by a huge hedge of bushes. AS SOON as we turned we saw this HUGE and I mean HUGE cop barrel past us and we started to skate a little faster and we almost made it to the end of the park before we were stopped by an off duty fire marshal.

FM"Were you kids skating in the park just now?"

Friend:"No?"

Kaze:"We were on our way home."

FM: You boys sit down, HEY I found some more who were probably skating in the park!!"

Kaze: "Um excuse me?"

FM: I said sit down.

Friend: "You dont' know what were were just doing, you're only assuming."

FM:"…"

We left after that even though the fire marshal told us to stop.

never got caught.

Fire-Fist

i survived suicide bombing

ponyjc

After immigrating to the USA, I entered the middle of fifth grade without knowing any English at all not even numbers, Parents were told I would repeat fifth grade and that they shouldn't be disappointed because it happens to most people in my situation, I proceeded to get straight A's and passing. not sure if its my accomplishment or the failure of the American education system.

MushroomBoy

@ponyjc:

After immigrating to the USA, I entered the middle of fifth grade without knowing any English at all not even numbers, Parents were told I would repeat fifth grade and that they shouldn't be disappointed because it happens to most people in my situation, I proceeded to get straight A's and passing. not sure if its my accomplishment or the failure of the American education system.

a little from column a, a little from column b.

Yoska

Hah. I can't really think any . Sure, I have plenty of stories of how I failed to do almost guaranteed possible but it hasn't yet happened otherway around.

taboo

my dad has a snaggle tooth that is exaggerated by his moustache

one day, i couldn't take it any more and i told him he had to go to a dentist to fix it

he said he had already talked to one and was going to have it replaced

i asked him how he got it, and he said he got hit in the face

"Really? What happened?"

HE WAS WELDING ON A SCAFFOLD AND THE GUY 20 FEET ABOVE HIM DROPPED A FUCKING WRENCH ON HIS FACE AND ALMOST KNOCKED HIM OFF

then last year he survived an explosion at the plant he worked at in texas city

then he told me about how, when he was a kid, he ran over his foot with a lawn mower and cut off some toes

S7evin

@taboo:

HE WAS WELDING ON A SCAFFOLD AND THE GUY 20 FEET ABOVE HIM DROPPED A FUCKING WRENCH ON HIS FACE AND ALMOST KNOCKED HIM OFF

then last year he survived an explosion at the plant he worked at in texas city

then he told me about how, when he was a kid, he ran over his foot with a lawn mower and cut off some toes

You're dad sounds like one of the most perpetually unlucky men I have ever heard of. Where the fuck does he work? Dynamite plant? Poor guy.

IrishLuigi

@Taboo: Your dad sounds awesome. Can I shake his hand? (Assuming he still has all of his fingers)

Silverblade

This thread is turning out to be quite fun.

@S7evin:

I also got mugged once, but I fought back. I ended with two scars and the attacker pretty much shredded my jacket with his knife but I think I broke the guy's nose. They never did catch him, but I retained my cash and felt pretty badass for a week after that.

The best robber story I have ever heard.
You, sir, are a badass.

taboo

@S7evin:

You're dad sounds like one of the most perpetually unlucky men I have ever heard of. Where the fuck does he work? Dynamite plant? Poor guy.

He's a welder/pipefitter, which means he works at various plants welding pipes together. In 100 degree texas weather. In a full body welder's uniform/helmet. Welding. On scaffolds.

@Taboo: Your dad sounds awesome. Can I shake his hand? (Assuming he still has all of his fingers)

My grandad is the one you'd have to worry about the appendage issue, missing most of his toes from a car crash. But when you survived being hounded by Rommel in WWII, toes are nothing!!!

S7evin

@Silverblade:

The best robber story I have ever heard.
You, sir, are a badass.

Thank you sire for your kind words.
Honestly though, the whole thing was a complete adrenaline rush. As soon as the guy pulled out the knife I just started punching him. In the end I got him in a chokehold. When I let him go and went to run away he started to stand up and grabbed me by the jacket. I basically kicked in the general vicinity of his face just so he would let go.

Turns out the heel of my boot connected pretty solidly with his nose. So I just hear this wet crunching sound and I look back and there's a huge amount of blood just gushing out of his nose. Scared the crap out of me tbh. Luckily he was to preoccupied with his nose after that, so I managed to get away. Never saw him again, so yay for me.

@taboo:

He's a welder/pipefitter, which means he works at various plants welding pipes together. In 100 degree texas weather. In a full body welder's uniform/helmet. Welding. On scaffolds.

My grandad is the one you'd have to worry about the appendage issue, missing most of his toes from a car crash. But when you survived being hounded by Rommel in WWII, toes are nothing!!!

Man, my story sounds boring after these paragraphs. Badass must run in your blood with a heritage like that.

ChesCa

Two stories of overcoming the odds, one of shitass luck (spoilered for length):

! 1.) I'm applying for a temporary job editing text for a computer game and at the same time writing my senior thesis on the bombing of Japan (WWII class). What makes this story a little weaksauce is that I am a notorious procrastinator, but I usually prepare ahead of time and then just cut down to the wire. So I'm sending in samples via e-mail of what my writing is like and also trying to use the library computer to study. I intend to study at home, but just when I'm about to get really serious with my thesis and at the same time do a sort of initiation assignment for the job my computer goes kaput! I have to not only solely rely on the school's computer for my thesis (and my access was limited), but I had to put my job assignment on hold because it required downloading a program, which I couldn't do on the school computer. So thankfully, the guy I'm working with is a little understanding, but my deadline for the thesis is coming up in less than two weeks. While I work, I'm waiting for a new computer motherboard to arrive and it's estimated to come in three days. It comes in about eight days when I realize that the package I got was mixed up with the one the neighbors across the street needed. (Stupid postman). Then I get the thing into Geek Squad. I finally get my job assignment in, but I'm now less than five days away and I am finding myself spending any leisure time I have in school to write an approximately twenty page paper concerning the complex moral issues involving the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. To add to this problem, my dad is being a lazy ass and is wasting my precious time ordering me to do every little thing for him short of wiping his ass. (Ironically, he usually tries to guilt me away from my studies by mentioning how he's paying for my school). This eats up so much of my time that I have only about half the paper written and two days to go. As a last ditch effort, I resort to a combination of my class notes and wikipedia entries on the subject (I made sure any facts I looked up were verified with footnotes). I finish the assignment about half an hour before class with less than three hours of sleep and a half-assed bibliography.
I got the job and my paper got an A-. I wish I knew what I did right, but at least I made it out of college.
2.) Flash back one year: For the first four years of my college my stories were either:A) crap or B) incomprehensible. When it came to turn in my final story for the most advanced class in Creative Writing, my computer breaks down back then as well. I do get a reprieve to wait one more class session and I get it fixed. Unfortunately, when it does get fixed, it is the night before class and I can only type up one act of what was supposed to be a three act story, totaling 8 pages.
It was the first A I ever got on a story. To paraphrase Stephan Pastis of 'Pearls Before Swine,' you never know what is going to work.
Shitass Lucky Story: One time at work, I nearly got robbed. In order to open the register, I ask my supervisor up (the robber wasn't angry, and it seemed like a safe thing to do). I know I'm getting robbed because the guy has a gun hidden in his sweater. My supervisor does not see this and asks to see the gun before giving any money. The robber refuses, and so he doesn't get jack shit. The robber leaves saying that he 'saved his life.' I'm not complaining, but to this day I still ask myself WTF?
Hope that wasn't too long or boring for you all.

taboo

Man, my story sounds boring after these paragraphs. Badass must run in your blood with a heritage like that.

my sister is the one getting into college with a full ride from the air force

i'm just an art student :I

i did break my toe when i was a kid and never went to the doctor for it, so now it's bent funny and it feels tingly when it's cold out

S7evin

@taboo:

my sister is the one getting into college with a full ride from the air force

i'm just an art student :I

I really want to attend one of your family reunions. If only just to see if you start an inter-family boxing tournament. But your sister being sister being in the airforce… damn that's hardcore.

But being an art student is also cool. Surviving on their wits and creativity alone, always in danger of starvation, slave to no one... Kinda like a wandering samurai.:ninja:

i did break my toe when i was a kid and never went to the doctor for it, so now it's bent funny and it feels tingly when it's cold out

Same with my hip. Got hit by a car while skateboarding. Didn't break anything, but I've lost all feeling in a small area just above the left hip-bone. Sorta feels like the body part is falling asleep, right?

Malintex_Terek

@Cuddles:

Two stories of overcoming the odds, one of shitass luck (spoilered for length):

! 1.) I'm applying for a temporary job editing text for a computer game and at the same time writing my senior thesis on the bombing of Japan (WWII class). What makes this story a little weaksauce is that I am a notorious procrastinator, but I usually prepare ahead of time and then just cut down to the wire. So I'm sending in samples via e-mail of what my writing is like and also trying to use the library computer to study. I intend to study at home, but just when I'm about to get really serious with my thesis and at the same time do a sort of initiation assignment for the job my computer goes kaput! I have to not only solely rely on the school's computer for my thesis (and my access was limited), but I had to put my job assignment on hold because it required downloading a program, which I couldn't do on the school computer. So thankfully, the guy I'm working with is a little understanding, but my deadline for the thesis is coming up in less than two weeks. While I work, I'm waiting for a new computer motherboard to arrive and it's estimated to come in three days. It comes in about eight days when I realize that the package I got was mixed up with the one the neighbors across the street needed. (Stupid postman). Then I get the thing into Geek Squad. I finally get my job assignment in, but I'm now less than five days away and I am finding myself spending any leisure time I have in school to write an approximately twenty page paper concerning the complex moral issues involving the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. To add to this problem, my dad is being a lazy ass and is wasting my precious time ordering me to do every little thing for him short of wiping his ass. (Ironically, he usually tries to guilt me away from my studies by mentioning how he's paying for my school). This eats up so much of my time that I have only about half the paper written and two days to go. As a last ditch effort, I resort to a combination of my class notes and wikipedia entries on the subject (I made sure any facts I looked up were verified with footnotes). I finish the assignment about half an hour before class with less than three hours of sleep and a half-assed bibliography.
I got the job and my paper got an A-. I wish I knew what I did right, but at least I made it out of college.
Hope that wasn't too long or boring for you all.

Something similar happened to me in 7th grade.

I had to write a report on "women", so I wrote to Delaine Easten, the superintendent of schools in California at the time, and interviewed some immigrants on their admission process and life in another country.

I wrote six drafts of this essay, which was 10 pages not double spaced, because my old printer had died and I was using a funky early 1980's one that was more akin to a typewriter, so the paper had to be manually adjusted every few minutes and came on a reel, with the punctuated edges and everything.

I did most of the work on the day before the deadline, but on that night my computer died for some reason and then rebooted, deleting all of the work I'd written for the past couple nights. This was because I never actually saved the document and left it for Word's autosave, which didn't work apparently. I had to resort to an earlier draft (turok.doc) that wasn't nearly done and rewrote the entire thing by memory (about seven pages) in the few hours since then. It wasn't exact, but I'd rehearsed the paragraphs and sentences so many times it just poured out onto the keys. I think the adrenaline rush from the utter fear sort of helped as well. :V

It was surprisingly easy, but I don't think I could do that again.

Crossword

As far as doing assignments at the last minute are concerned, one of the assignments that I had to do once for 11th grade English was to pick a characters from Hamlet write a fifteen-minute speech defending their actions during the play, and present it to the class. I chose Claudius, for some reason. Wrote the whole thing in like ten minutes the night before, glanced over it a few times before class the next day, and the presentation went off without a hitch and the teacher told me that she thought it was one of the better ones in the class.

It was such a great feeling.