Shanks' possible before-death speech to Luffy

Zkaiser

This thread is fucking holy.
Do we have a Hall of Gods to put this in?

Dolus

@Captain:

Shanks: How cliché would it be if I gave a speech if I died?
Luffy: Very, I hope Oda doesn't write it this way.

I lol'd

16 characters

OldSnake

(Quicky, not that funny but I just thought of it)

Shanks: LETS ALL HAVE A PARTY!! LUFFY IS PIRATE KING!!!

Luffy/crew/everybody: YEEHHHH!!!

Everyone drinks and Shanks dies of alcohal poisoning.

*Meh*

"You can keep the hat…but you still have to pay both our tabs to Makino."

Luffy keeps the hat, and is later arrested in Windmill Village by Coby, after returning to pay Makino the money he owed her. Sengoku's goat is revealed to be a Nazi officer, and despite the incongruity of it all, is denounced for crimes commited on some other planet. This causes a crises of faith between the World Gov't. and its military branch (the Marines), allowing Dragon to seize power and convert people to his terrifying furry-themed rape-cult. Luffy, disgusted with the whole affair, eats the hat. Amazingly, it was the antidote to the poison Crocodile had used on him during their first fight, and the whole story backtracks to the Alabasta Arc.

Skull Kid

This post is deleted!

regasatanum

@_Meh_:

Amazingly, it was the antidote to the poison Crocodile had used on him during their first fight, and the whole story backtracks to the Alabasta Arc.

lol. Reminds me of Butterfly effect + Donnie Darko

Insider2000

@Zkaiser:

This thread is fucking holy.
Do we have a Hall of Gods to put this in?

We have 'Archives', which hold some of the best threads ever.

I want to make another.

Luffy: Shanks! sob You can't die!
Shanks: You're right! I can't! Yohohohoho!
Luffy: Shanks?
REAL Shanks: I'm over here Luffy.
Luffy: looks at the person he's holding
Brooke: I'm already dead. YOHOHOHOHO! Skull Joke! Luffy drops him

@Insider2000:

We have 'Archives', which hold some of the best threads ever.

I want to make another.

Luffy: Shanks! sob You can't die!
Shanks: You're right! I can't! Yohohohoho!
Luffy: Shanks?
REAL Shanks: I'm over here Luffy.
Luffy: looks at the person he's holding
Brooke: I'm already dead. YOHOHOHOHO! Skull Joke! Luffy drops him

joke of the day…...or at least i made me laugh lol

Ms. Suave Debonair

Shanks:
"Cheer up, Luffy. You know what they say…"

! UQoGSlrkgkI

You saw it here first.

rufolo

Jadosra

AHAHAHAHAHAH, this thread is epic.

Even though i'm not funny, i'l try this one:

Luffy: SHANKS… I FINALLY BECAME... THE KING OF THE PIRATES
Shanks: (Coughing blood) Aff... that's good to know, Luffy.
Luffy: So, i will give you the hat back
Shanks: Wait..
Luffy: What?
Shanks: THE HAT...
Luffy: ???
Shanks: THE HAT... IS...
Luffy: THE HAT IS WHAT?
Shanks: THE HAT IS A LIE!!!
Luffy: WHAT? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Shanks dies and Luffy cries and kills himself.

BB: LULZ, SO RANDUM XD

SympathyX

Luffy….

....have you ever seen a grown man naked?

Yonkou3

@SympathyX:

Luffy….

....have you ever seen a grown man naked?

What's that quote from?

And another entry by me.

Luffy: Shanks…

Shanks:Coughs Luffy... have you ever been kicked at the speed of light?

Luffy: Huh?

Shanks: Gets up and roundhouse kicks luffy so hard his neck stretches back to when luffy beats lucci and luffy gets to watch the whole amazing affair over again just before his neck is ripped from his body by the force.
"I said you could borrow it. Who borrows another nigga's hat for ten fucking years You know how many head colds i caught cuz of you!?"
Pulls zipper from back of neck and is revealed to be going merry who then gives the crowd a Nice guy pose and teh series ends. Oda then stars his next series, The life and times of the going merry

Robby

So. I read the first page of this thread, and wrote it off as utter nonsense… and then somebody got quoted and I was directed back here, to discover that in just the short time of two pages, is thread has become all sorts of ep---DONafied.

This is great. Carry on.

Angel emfrbl

@Yonkou#3:

What's that quote from?

And another entry by me.

Luffy: Shanks…

Shanks:Coughs Luffy... have you ever been kicked at the speed of light?

Luffy: Huh?

Shanks: Gets up and roundhouse kicks luffy so hard his neck stretches back to when luffy beats lucci and luffy gets to watch the whole amazing affair over again just before his neck is ripped from his body by the force.
"I said you could borrow it. Who borrows another nigga's hat for ten fucking years You know how many head colds i caught cuz of you!?"
Pulls zipper from back of neck and is revealed to be going merry who then gives the crowd a Nice guy pose and teh series ends. Oda then stars his next series, The life and times of the going merry

ITs from Airplane….

16 characters of throwing up in disgust at bad flims.

blacky

Shanks: "Luffy… you... cough... dragon... your mother... key to... ancient weapons... the lost century... one piece ... i beg you... raftel.... gold roger.... don't... please!!!!... ugh... " dies.

Yeah, something like that.

Ivotas

@blacky:

Shanks: "Luffy… you... cough... dragon... your mother... key to... ancient weapons... the lost century... one piece ... i beg you... raftel.... gold roger.... don't... please!!!!... ugh... " dies.

Yeah, something like that.

Where do I have to subscribe to get that? Seriously, if something like that comes at the end Oda would have practically turned One Piece into my favorite anti-joke with which I tortured half Frankfurt.^^

kabok

Okay okay let me try now =*

Shanks: "Luffy … Forget everything you've learned from your adventure , everything I taught you . The true way to become the Pirate King is the OOOOOOKAMA WAYYYYY !!!!"
Luffy: "M...! M...! Mr. 2 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Captain Josh

Shanks: This is the end Luffy, it was fun while it lasted…
Shanks Dies
Luffy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
Distant voice saying "Luffy... luffy... wake up luffy...
Luffy: Huh? Ohh it was all a dream, the whole adventure, I wish I was really a pirate.
Luffy's Mom: Well you have to get ready for school now, go have a shower.
Luffy: Okay mom.

THE END OF ONE PIECE

GuetaMinute

^Lol pokemanz

here ya go:
Ending of One Piece

Shanks: Luffy…Remember
Luffy: WHAT!? cries moar
Shanks: cough you're a faggot, no one likes you, you're a fucking piece of shit motherfucker with no life, your mom is a fucking prostitute, your father is a wife-beating alcoholic, you are adopted, your pets are being skinned alive, your brother was raped and killed, all your friends died in a horrible blimp accident

And I dont like you.. die
Luffy: oh lol kthxbye

Truth

Shanks: "…I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine." dies

Luffy: "What did he mean by that?"

Robin: "Eh, who cares? He's dead."

pyromonki

Shanks:"Where do you think I'll go when I die? Luffy?"

Luffy:"Robin what do you think?"

Robin:"He'll most likely go to hell and get ripped limb by limb only to live through the pain worse than death itself…."

.....

Luffy:"eh... to a place with lot's of meat"

Shanks:"They both sound awful! I don-" dies

Kabi

Shanks will not die
Probably just retire from being a pirate cause his era is over and need to open path to the new ones

Zik

@Kabi:

Shanks will not die
Probably just retire from being a pirate cause his era is over and need to open path to the new ones

You do realize this works under the premise of IF Shanks dies right? Also what you're saying is simply your opinion not fact.

Yonkou3

@Zik:

You do realize this works under the premise of IF Shanks dies right? Also what you're saying is simply your opinion not fact.

Obviously he fails to grasp the concept Zik. Damn Video games, rotting kids minds i tell ya.

Kryptoncat

The epic battle beyond all epicness had come to pass. The bodies of the world's most feared pirates lay on the ground in pitiful heaps. "Red-haired" Shanks, gasping for breath, placed his only hand over his aching chest as a younger dark-haired man bent his injured knees and knelt beside his hero.

"Luffy," Shanks wheezed, "T-take it." He nodded his head towards a scraggly mess of straw and faded red ribbon lying on the ground beside him.

Luffy stared at the remains of the hat, and Shanks gave a false chuckle. "I - I lost the-"

"Shanks?" Luffy asked in tears as the older man sighed and closed his eyes.

! "I lost the game!"

A lone silent man gazed down upon the chaos he had caused. His panda-like face smiled. Yes, it was good to finally be the Pirate King.

D Gail

Shanks: …
Luffy: ...
Shanks: ?
Luffy: ?
Shanks: ...
Luffy: ?
Shanks: !
Luffy: ?
Shanks: ...
Luffy: ...
Shanks: Well this is just terrible.
Luffy: ?
Shanks: ...
Luffy: ?
Shanks: I got no script...
Luffy: ...

Oda: I can fix that right now.

few minutes later

Shanks: ...
Luffy: ...
Shanks: ?
Luffy: ...
Shanks: Luffy...
Luffy: ...
Shanks: It's been thirty seconds.
Luffy: ...
Shanks: It's time...
Luffy: ...
Shanks: Can you hand me your hat?
Luffy: ...
Shanks: That's good, it's still whole after 83 years.
Luffy: ...
Shanks: I'll just...take a...------------------
Luffy: ...
Shanks: -------------
Luffy: My balls itch.

akatsuki_the_devil

why would shanks have to die? i'd like him to see Luffy's execution when he gets capture after he becomes the pirate king…

Captain Brooke

Shanks:…......................
Luffy:..........................
Shanks: I'm dying
Luffy:..............ok

Best speech EVER....imo, thread closed!

Blue-Eyes

Hmm. MONKEY D. Luffy, a BIG treasure. …. I just randomly think of Monkey Island 1, the treasure of Melee Island. A T-shirt, 100% cotton.

Everyone respects the king of the pirates. Every pirate in the world celebrates the end of an era, and the beginning of a new one. Whitebeard Pirates, Buggy Pirates, even Kriegs Pirates are there. The Shichibukai, ... you get the idea. Some people later claimed they even saw a grim looking Sengoku. The party goes on for weeks, enough money for fleets of warships is spent on the biggest victory party ever.

Then. A joyful laugh. A proud Monkey D. Luffy presents the biggest treasure in the world and he holds One Piece into the air. Tears of joy run down his face. For several minutes the music stopped. Nobody dares to talk. Or to breath. The biggest Pirates in the world stare at the item of Luffy's joy. Sweat running down their cheeks. Only Rayleigh gives a knowing smile.

One of the yonkou catches his breath as the first one. His haki gave him the power, needed to deal with the shock. Shanks tries not to stutter when he formed the words:

"I spent.... my whole life.... in getting.... A LOUSY T-SHIRT?!"

And he died of anger.

SantoryuMaster97

Shanks: Luffy..the ultimate attack..beat your meat
Luffy:What meat where!?

FireFistAce 0

Shanks: "Luffy, come closer…"

Luffy: "Yeah, Shanks-san?"

Shanks: "I have something to tell you..."

Luffy: "What is it?"

Shanks: "In a neat little town they call Windmill Village... A Pirate Band I did found. And many a drink of Sake, I drank in that sweet little town."

Luffy: "And Then?"

Shanks: "And then bad misfortune befell me, and caused me to lose my left arm... Far away from my friends and companions, to follow the Pirate King's Band..."

Kabi

i get the concept of the thread

but the first post make it like a drama show that will never happend and its not funny like the others

so it was a kind of correction

cause im sure the one that started this wasnt meaning to be something funny

D Gail

Shanks: Luffy…now this is a story all about how my arm got flipped, turned upside down and I like to take a minute just sit right there I'll tell you how I became murdered on a town called Raftel.

In West Alabasta born and raised, In the castleground is where I spent most of my days. Chilling out maxin' relaxing and cool and all and shooting with Yasopp outside of the dunes when the Shichibukai who were up to no good, started making trouble in the Oro-hood. I got in one little fight and Rayleigh then said: "You're moving with Buggy to the Moby Dick in Raftel.

I begged and pleaded with him day after day but he packed my barrel and sent me on my way. He gave me a kick and gave me a ticket. I put my strawhat on and said "I might as well kick it"

Stowaways, yo this is bad. Drinking sake and beer through a seakings fangs. Is this the people of Raftel been living like? Hmmm this might be alright.

But wait I hear in Shabondy Archipelago, Tenryuubito and all that. This is a better place to wreak havoc wearing a strawhat. Dracule thought so, Buggy led us there. I hope they're prepared for the Strawhat with Red-Hair.

Well, the ship landed and when I came out there was a dude that looked like Garp standing there with my name out. I ain't trying to get arrested I just got here. I sprang with the quickness of soru, disappeared.

I den-den mushid a Yagara and when it came near the license plate said 'Dereshi' and it had Saul in the rear. If anything I can say this Yagara is rare. But I thought "Naw forget it" Yo Saul to Raftel!

I pulled up the Island about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the driver you Saul see you later. I looked at this island I was finally there to only get pawed by Kuma the Bear.

FireFistAce 0

f2b1D5w82yU

Shanks' final words to Luffy.

GuetaMinute

@Fire Fist:

f2b1D5w82yU

Shanks' final words to Luffy.

I fucking love you, have my babies I want TO MARRY YOU…

Is what I would say if that video worked. Embedding disabled, jackass :getlost: (Just kidding, you're cool) but I can still imagine it. It'd be fucking epic.

Oda RICKROLL'D us.

Insider2000

"There is another Skywalker!"

*Meh*

Luffy: Shanks!

Shanks: (Raises head, looks around) Huh? Hey, I'm still alive! Whaddya know!

Luffy: Shanks, I thought you were dead!

Shanks: Well kid, for a moment there I did too. (Walks onto prow of ship) Guess I'm one lucky bastard, huh?

(Giant Sea King Bites off entire prow of ship)

Luffy: SHANKS!!

Zik

@_Meh_:

Luffy: Shanks!

Shanks: (Raises head, looks around) Huh? Hey, I'm still alive! Whaddya know!

Luffy: Shanks, I thought you were dead!

Shanks: Well kid, for a moment there I did too. (Walks onto prow of ship) Guess I'm one lucky bastard, huh?

(Giant Sea King Bites off entire prow of ship)

Luffy: SHANKS!!

LMAO!

Reminded me of Samuel L. Jackson in Deep Blue Sea

Robby

Luffy steps out of the burning elevator, and stares down Blackbeard, their final confrontation come at last. "You're going down, buster!" Blackbird laugs coquetishly. "How ironic, it isn't you that I want rubberman, but your friend, Redhaired Shanks!"

Luffy grins, ready for a fight. "Well tough luck buster, he isn't even here!" Then, a voice comes from behind them "Oh yes I am!" Shanks steps out from behind a rock, already wounded and bleeding at the shoulder from a wound he took earlier, and removes the strawheat from Lufyf's head, placing it upon his own. Luffy lets out an internal gasp. "He is Redhaired Shanks, I don't believe it." Shanks properly situates his hat and takes a dramatic stance, posing dramatically. "You should get out of here Luffy! This fight doesn't concern you any more"
"Of course it concerns me, you kidding?!! If we stick together, we can beat him. Let's do it!"

Shanks looks solemn. "Luffy, I have to earn One Piece."
Luffy sighs. "I know, so you can find your princess…" which Shanks shrugs aside with a simple "Yeah."

Blackbeard, uninterested in the conversation, taunts again. "So, Rehaired shanks, you still interested in One Piece, or not?"
"You know I am! But you've got to guarantee a fair fight and Luffy's safety first!"
Blackbeard grins, "Of course, I wouldn't have it any other way..." while in the distance, unnoticed by anyone, one of Teach's subordinated prepares his gun.

Blackbeard beckons. "Well come on then, lets get it over with!" and Shanks obliges, nodding and noting "You're on." while walking forward, still unaware of the deadly sniper behind him.

Shanks hears a sound and turns just in time to see the bullet streaming towards him, but not in time dodge. Luffy screams out an agonized "waaaatch ooooout!" but to no avail, as the bullet pierces Shank's heart. Shanks falls to the ground, his newly re-aquired strawhat flying off.

Shanks lies dying,and Luffy runs to his side screaming a slow agonized "nooo-ooooohooo! " He falls to his knees besides Shanks, tears in his eyes. "Strawhat Shanks!" Shanks lets out "It's up to you to reclaim the One Piece... and I want you to know... I've always been on your side, and always will be." His hand falls limp to the ground, and Luffy cries. "Strawhat Shanks, no, please don't go!"

Dramatic music begins to play, and the rest of Luffy's crew arrives just too late, and all make bitter commentary to the fact. Blackbeard continues to gloat, pleased at his trickery in having killed Shanks.

One of Luffy's tears freezes in place on his cheek, and radiates magic energy. All the various parts of One Piece, though far away, gather to Luffy's single tear and fuse into one massive crystal, which comes to rest the on the bracelet Luffy put on the end of Thriller Bark.

Luffy's crew again makes assinine comments, Brook tossing out an innapropriate skull joke at Shank's expense, it being the innapropriate dub instead of the meotional Japanese track. Ussop asks "What happens now?" to which Nami replies, "I don't know. Maybe the King will be revealed!" "it's Luffy!" "He's the pirate king? Who'd have thought?"

Luffy clutches the newly formed massive crystal, and an elegant white dress suddenly plooms out from Luffy's usual attire, a blank look appearing in his eyes, as his soul seems to vanish, and lost memories reappear. He then notes blithley "Me Luffy? The Pirate King? Now this is way past wierd!"

then after sentimental montage, the scene cuts to one of those annoying Public Service Annoucements titles "Strawhat Says!" and gives a crappy moral about not running with scissors, or looking both ways before crossing the street, or something.

EDIT: Its official. My overlong Sailor Moon joke killed this awesome thread. My bad.

Jadosra

FireFist Ace
I'm already imagining it:

[Shanks is in the floor, bleeding and almost dying, Luffy gets to him and starts crying while waking him up]
Shanks: I have to tell you something…
Luffy: WHAT, SHANKS? WHAAAAAAT???? (Cries)
Shanks: I will...
Luffy: ...
Shanks: I will never...
Luffy: You will never what?
[Shanks stands up, every Pirate joins him, including Crocodile, Blackbeard, Whitebeard, etc]
Shanks: I WILL NEVER GIVE YOU UP, I WILL NEVER LET YOU DOWN, I WILL NEVER RUN AROUND AND DESERT YOUUU
I WILL NEVER MAKE YOU CRY, I WILL NEVER SAY GOODBYEEEEE, NEVER GONNA TELL A LIE… AND HURT YOUUUUUUUU!!!

FiktySen

Shanks : Luffy …

Luffy : Yes...

Shanks : Luffy...ah...

Luffy : Yes...

Shanks : ah...ah..

Luffy : Yes !

Shanks : Ah ! Ah ! Ah !

Luffy : Oh Yes ! Yes ! Yes !

Shanks : AHHHHHHHH......

Luffy : YESSSSSSSSS....

Gorlom

Shanks steals material from Monty Python and

A) starts to sing a medly of monty python songs, including "I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK"

B) goes the black knight way and insists he can keep going despite losing all his limbs..

C) tells the joke from "the worlds funniest joke" sketch and kills everyone within earshot.

Jadosra

LOOOOOOL, Gorlom, that was priceless…

Another example of Monty Phyton.

A) Shanks decides to have a last banket, and eats with Luffy, he explodes at the end by eating Luffy's finger while distracted (Chewing Gum)

B) Shanks shows Luffy how to do sex.

C) Shanks shows how useless is life by singing a song

(Yes, "Meaning of Life" is one of my favourites of them)