Tased Map of the Tearful Black Sand Oasis
A Lobster Fanfic
It was night
It was bright
The sky radiated with the essence of adventure
[a man enters the scene. He stands on a boat made of glass, drifting on the sea]
The look up and sees a giant pirate ship, with an enormous mast
[the ship is made out of a rough black surface, all enclosed, with delicious yellow lemon lighting flooding outwards onto the surface of the water]
The man hears a party on board and then suddenly.. his eye catches something behind the ship. No! Several things. ENORMOUS!! The ship is dragging islands! Entire islands!
[His glass boat then cracks and the shear ominence of it all pirate ship]
[He then snaps his talons and shoots into the air]
The Man: "Chu.." [as he sucks his teeth, while folding his arms behind his back]
His back then cracks, causing all of his body to go limp noodle, as arms then jettison forward like a petrified mummy.
Two long black lines shoot out from his back.
The Man: "Ts Ts Ts Ku Ku Ku" [eyes turn yellow as the lines then burst into Falcon Wings]
(On the ship)
Brimestone: "Capitan, Capitan.. Loook!!"
(large massive man in black, with diamond encrusted gems shooting out of his back)
Limestone: "Another Island Capitan!!" "Another one!" "Another one!!"
(skinny man with sharp pink teeth, and long celery green hair)
Rimestone: "It sure is a large continent.." "It looks like we'll be having some fun with this one.." [puts on lip gloss]
(female with long strawberry red hair, red striped tank top and leggings)
Limestone: "Some fun with this one!! Some fun with this one!!"
Rimestone: "OMG!@1 Chutt Up!!" [jumps on Limestone]
Limestone: "A new island to mandane! A new island to sustain! A new island to ravage!!"
Rimestone: "Chutt Up Chutt Up Chutt Up!!" [grabs him with her legs and starts slapping him repeatedly]
Limestone: "Ravage like Cabbage!! Till all the sands of that sleepy little city witty turn black like the mast! Turn black real fast! And all their tears to mudane us!!
Rimestone: "WTF is wrong with you!?" "Stop making up mother f%^&king words you d@mn horse lipped mouth of a reject tetra shed!"
[Limestone jumps on Rimestone's head starts pulling her hair]
Rimestone: "Haaaaaaaaaa" [runs around]
[camera pans to a large man on a Capitan's throne]
(Capitan Deathstone, of the Deathstone Pirates: 8 feet tall. Big man. Wearing a Pirate coat)
Deathstone: "Ma.. hey, looks like we've finally reached port in Nanohana" [at Arabasta]
Deathstone: "Well.. since we're dragging these islands… I suppose that one could say we've reached several!!"
DEATHSTONE CREW: [face palms]
Deathstone: "Alright… um.. Go out have fun blowing lots a $h%t up".
DEATHSTONE CREW: "Horray!!" [frolics into town holding hands, singing Distance, by Long Shot Party]
TO BE CONTINUED
Pell: "Why am I alive!? My memory is gone! And why do I have Ponyglif markings tattooed all over my body?" "What gives?"
Rimestone: "I just looove a man in uniform"
Limestone: "Uuu Perrru. I've got a little secret to teeeell you"
Rimestome & Limestone: "Kukukukuukuku!!" [glaring at Pell]