http://groups.msn.com/SuperSpoon/chapter1.msnw
please go to the site and join and read my manga,. i hope everyone will go to the message board and give me your opinions…
Untitled
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It's okey but it need more details. ex: the clothes
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yeah i agree..but the lcothign for the main chracter is what i have used since forever..like 3rd grade..so i def wont change that..but other ppl..i def am trying to..i'm not REALLY fantastic with detail..i've improved a considerable amount,but i'm still working on it…^___^;;;
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Looks like everyone from Dragon Ball mated with someone from Chibi Maruko Chan then beat their offspring senseless with an ugly stick.
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i dont like it
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Originally posted by omae no kaasan v.2@Apr 17 2005, 08:45 PM
Looks like everyone from Dragon Ball mated with someone from Chibi Maruko Chan then beat their offspring senseless with an ugly stick.
[snapback]32770[/snapback]You know, constructive critique is alot more helpfull. Saying that though, your comment cracks me up :)
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eh..well its true..i use to have compelte dragonball style..but i really couldnt think of a TRUE original style..but this is the best i can come up for now..sry..>___<
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Originally posted by neostar8710@Apr 17 2005, 03:30 PM
yeah i agree..but the lcothign for the main chracter is what i have used since forever..like 3rd grade..so i def wont change that..[snapback]32753[/snapback]your main character is wearing a simple white sleeveless shirt with a matching simple white pair of pants.
and that's pretty much what the other characters are wearing.
If I didn't read from the start, I probably wouldn't be able to distinguish your main character from the other characters.
right now your character doesn't even stand out from among the crowds
at least draw some folds in his clothes or add some shadings
please don't say 'I've used that since forever…like 3rd grade...so I definitely won't change that'
change is good
and if you want readers to stay and continue reading your work
you better prepare to make some sacrafices
so...
give your main character a make-over
add in some shadings and textures so the page doesn't look so blank (white)
and...
um...I'm not going to touch upon your story writingas for the resemblence to Dragonball...
don't let people who make fun of you of your DB style get you down
(because you will meet lots)
every artist began from somewhere, every artist started by copying another artist's style
Oda himself was greatly inspired by Akira Toriyama himself
his early pieces very much resembled DragonBall until he developed his own style
so keep practicing until you find your own style
and do put more effort in improving yourself
you still have a long way to go -
Don't apologise as there is nothing to apologise about. Just use this as a spur on your abilities, work to get better.
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yeah..well i agree..but i def did change alot of designs on my other chracters..its just that main character..everone else..i def did do a makeover..and yeah..i'm pretty bad at shading and stuff..and the story..i guess its a little copyoff…but i REALLY did try to put original points into it along with the shonen formula..but i REALLY do appreciate all these negative comments..cause i think one can benefit more with what they do wrong then what is right..
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Man, you could be a helluva manga artist i you'd just make your own style. Im being totally serious about this because I have a friend who was just like you, constantly copying the Toriyama style of art and eventually, he figured out that the onlyway people will really like his art is if he makes it original. I'd suggest doing that or you'll get even harsher comments than what you've got so far.
(….damn, did that feel like an after school special or what?)
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Hey, it's better than anything I could draw. Just keep at it…whenever I start drawing a comic, I give up after about two pages.
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It's much better than any of my drawings. It's pretty good.
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My only problem is your style. I can't really give good tips on developing your own style. It's really just something you need to develop on your own.
